Finally Deactivated

I have had facebook for over 5 years, and just like the other stories on here, facebook has made me feel more isolated than connected. I can't lie, it's been good to me. There were parties I was invited to, people I have met, etc.

But facebook is also a huge waste of time, and a breeding-ground for drama. Girls, esp., are guilty of this. They (myself included) go on facebook to see what other people are up to, who is dating whom, who is going to school where, etc. I found myself checking notifications and messages 3-5 times a day. Flipping through people's profiles and status updates for hours at a time. For what? Why? Meanwhile I wasn't going out as much because I forgot I didn't actually see the people who were my "friends."

I deactivated my account a few days ago and life is a little weird. Things are quiet. Over the last few months I've used facebook less and less so this wasn't that difficult on me. But finally, I feel the freedom of not logging on and seeing photos from a party I wasn't invited to. Photos of couples making out in 50 photos (in the same pose/room), while I'm single for what feels like forever. Status updates from weddings, drunken after-parties, people's exhausted days, depressed rants, etc.

And the best part is, I don't have to worry about who to add/delete anymore. That's probably the worst part of facebook. It's that you have to keep some people and block others, or private your information because someone may read it. I never had anything to hide, but I'm glad it's that if someone found out I like The Food Network lol they wouldn't judge me for it. I don't like living in 1984.

(It hasn't been too good for my dating life, and I'm glad it's finally gone. I'll be deleting it completely soon. Whew)
chancesbreathe chancesbreathe
22-25, F
8 Responses Aug 9, 2010

I've been deactivated for a year and 4 months. I don't even know how to describe just the awesome liberation I felt from not knowing about what other people are up to and all that jazz. I felt particularly pressed into deactivating in 2010 when I had become a stalker to a guy I used to date whose account was practically public. I felt enraged, jealous, depressed whenever I'd see pictures of him and different girls. Finally, one day I decided, this is not the person that I want to be. I prayed about it and God has been truly gracious in this area. It was not easy AT ALL. I allowed myself to re-activate last year during the summer but after 3 days, I just didn't want any of that mayhem again and deactivated. This summer I reactivated and went off it after 2 days. It's just a whole world out there that is unreal but has so much power and influence over one's life! Such mayhem is unnecessary and will only bring undue clutter to a person's life. I am sooo happy and thankful to God for helping me in the whole process. Fellow deactivatees, I am proud of us and we can do this!

i think that fb is good to know news (plitics, culture....) so u can only see pages.<br />
for friend it's good to see and to ask for news but really i prefer to contact them or telephone<br />
i don't like to disactivate my fb but i don't like to accept any other:

I sooo agree! I deactivate my FB more than often now. The older I get, the more I hate it because of the drama and the addiction it has caused. Especially the drama with people I don't even know in real life!!!!! Instead of spending money on buying yarn to knit scarves for cancer patients, I'm spending it on sucky applications that don't have any significance at all! How sick is that! Facebook also creates a sick fantasy/facade in which people use it as a cover up so no one will know how depressed, unhappy, miserable their lives really are.

I agree with this completely, I deleted mine about 4 months ago and I just feel like my time is my own. I like to keep some social circles separate, like my aunt who lives away dosnt need to be introduced to an Ex or a guy I worked with when I was 17. This is my first summer in 5 years without some kinda social media site (aside from EP) and Ill have to say in some ways it was dull but thats kinda what I was looking for. I still did stuff like bike just about everyday, go to the lake, see movies, and it was all without explaining myself or opening it up for someone to comment on. There are certain people I prolly wont see again and that does suck but like you said, the good out weighs the bad. I dont feel like my life is on display anymore, and its a good feeling.

Yeap! That's the way I feel too, that my life is not on display anymore and it's a GREAT feeling!

@euphoriakitten - I'm with you, 100%. Facebook is not easy to let go of, I had many withdrawal symptoms, too. I keep wanting to look notifications and messages! Now, I can't believe it's been over TWO weeks and wow my life is sooooo calm. There is little to no drama from friends, and I still keep in touch with the people I really care about via cell phone and email. I've also given my number to more friends, which is freeing because I no longer ask, "Do you have a facebook?" Instead I say, "Can I have your number? (or email?)" Which in the end, is way more personal. Adding someone on fb can be great, but it's more like adding them to your list of "friends." Getting someone's number is more like, "Hey, we should talk/hang out."<br />
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BTW I love EP. It's not like any social website. I can be myself on here and always find people who are willing to talk - on EP and off. It's a very freeing website, and a great way to kill time/forget about things when you're upset. Yes, the crazies make it occasionally scary but the good outweighs the bad. :-)

I know what you mean!<br />
My biggest problem: it is a literal breeding ground for drama. I can't tell you how many times I've gotten mad at people because of something stupid I saw on their facebook... to think, there wouldn't have been any of this bullshit if I didn't have a facebook in the first place. How completely ridiculous. <br />
I just recently got my account back and it has been hell for me. I feel like I'm on meth or coke, I can't stop checking it constantly.. it's so impulsive as soon as I wake up I turn on my phone and checked it immediately for any notifications or friend requests. <br />
I just deactivated it a couple hours ago because I need to start focusing on school work and I can't imagine how bad facebook would've taken over my real priorities if I would've kept it available still. That's also why I reopened my EP account.. at least I have something to do on the computer, anything is better than facebook. I'm going through a little withdrawal right now (ridiculous!) but feel calmer knowing nobody can comment or request me...<br />
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The best thing would be to delete it, I agree with you. or keep it deactivated. <br />
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Screw facebook! :-) EP lives on...!

Yes, exactly aislersan! I was so tired of logging on and thinking, "wow, everyone is having a blast, putting their lives in order, while I'm such a loner/loser." Which is SO untrue! Facebook creates this facade, it's only a mask of happiness/success. Deep down, most of those people on my facebook aren't happy with their lives at all. I knew some that have all these smiling photos of themselves with friends, but during the day they walk around like miserable zombies.

Good for you! Facebook is such a time kill and a source of too much drama.<br />
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I haven't deactivated my account, but a couple of months ago, I made a conscious decision to not visit it so often. I would visit it several times during the workday and it was actually getting to me. I was starting to get annoyed that other people seemed to be having a blast in their lives, socializing, etc. while I was being a loner. Very few people would comment on my status updates. So, I forced myself not to log in for a couple of weeks. After that two weeks, I felt great. Now, I check it every once in a while, maybe like once or twice a month, but overall I feel like I can look at it in context now and feel good.