Lied To And Broken

Awhile ago i met an amazing guy who broke up with me. I am still not fully over this person but i never will be and it got to the point 4 months ago i decided to move on from him. Four months ago i went out to a friends party and met another amazing guy i had feelings for him instantly and we had a great connection. We kept seeing each otehr and being friends we got on great together. He worked in a shop with a close friend of both of ours so i knew from this friend she would be honest to me about how he really felt about me. Whenever i spoke to this friend she would always say he really likes u and is reallty interested in u. A couple of months later i had fallen in love with him and felt it was time i told him my feelings. We arranged to meet up a month ago and went for a walk. As we walked he said i need to tell u something. I was nervous but excited when he said this. He said i really like u and i dont want to be friends i want to be more. I couldnt believe it and i felt over the moon. He told me that our close friend was the only person who knew what he was planning to do i thought it was weird she hadnt mentioned anything but i just ignored that fact. As the weeks went on he told me that we couldnt tell anyone apart from very close friends that we were seeeing each other and we couldnt tell our close friend. I found this very strange and asked why he said doesnt matter it will just make work awkward i loved him so accepted it. A couple of weeks later i was in so much love with him but he kept letting me down we would arrange to meet and then he would cancel or he would make up an excuse as to why we couldnt meet up. By him doing this i felt very hurt but i loved him so put up with it. It then got to the point last week that he sent me a text in the morning but was just blunt with me i asked what was going on that i loved him did he feel the same about me. He didn't text me back for over 24hours. When he text me again he said sorry but he has to end it he gave me a ton of excuses and that he was under to much stress from other things in his life. I was crushed like when my ex before had left me and devestated. I met up with a close friend she held me as i sunk to the floor crying and screaming and held me close. i then managed to ring our close friend had to tell her we were seeing each other casue otherwise she would wonder why i was upset. I now no the truth. This friend said what u on about u cant have been seeing him i said why not. He had told our close friend i was over the top full on he never wanted to be with me at all he and lied right to my face about wanting to be with me and liking me. I had to hang up on this friend because speaking was impossible. I feel so used and lied to now i loved once again someone i believed to be true but wasnt. Im broken and in more of a mess than ever i no he is not worth my tears yet i cant help but still love him i cant control feelings of the heart. I feel like my heart is completely broken all i wanted was for someone to love me back and be honest with me i never knew that was to much to ask for.......i feel like my heart is breaking
lylkitkat lylkitkat
18-21, F
2 Responses Dec 9, 2012

Are you ok now?

yeah thanks im ok now how are you

I understand how you feel, that physical pain of a broken heart. But you a proof that your heart can mend and you can love again. You moved on once before from what you thought was true love, you can move on again. It's easy for me, an outsider, to tell you that this boy sounds like a pretty **** person who is not worth your tears, but I understand that this is impossible for you to see. But trust me, one day you will see it. It may take years and will be difficult, but one day you will wake up, think of him and wonder what you ever saw. Save yourself for someone who is worth your time and heart <3

thank you for your reply things like this do take time i no that and so much has changed since i posted this but yeah i saved my time for someone who was so worth it thank u <3