My gf has fibromyalgia and at this very moment she is in bed, hopefully sleeping as she has been in so much pain she has been in tears all day. I am now laying on the sofa knowing I can't go to bed as if I wake her she will be back in pain as sleep is sometimes her only rest.
It is so hard watching someone you care about have a condition that will never really get any better as she is on as many pain killers as is health. Her body is seeing the effects as she no longer can exercise so she has gain about two stone, all in her arse. Which I hate myself for noticing but I do and I can't say anything as I know there is nothing she can do. I do worry that I am not finding her attractive anymore, I hope that's not true.
We argue a lot more than we used to, I know why that is. It's due to this horrid condition as she is always in pain so has a shorter fuse. Which I know she tries so hard not to respond to but she can't always help it and I sometimes forget that her tone of voice isn't down to trying to be nasty, it's because she is hurting.
I want it make her better, I wanna help, but I just can't do anything. I am her carer but there is nothing I can really do to help her through it when she is in so much pain nothing helps. I miss having my old gf, before she had this condition. I hate having my life dictated to by a condition that most people know nothing about. I hate fibromyalgia so much as it is destroying a good person and hurting my life and my children's life's.
Lightandshadows Lightandshadows
36-40, M
Aug 21, 2014