Long Story

When I was young I was often hit by my stepfather (i'm a woman).

There was something just clearly wrong with my family and the amount of hitting I received.

Long story short- step father ended up going to jail for sexual molestation.

I then watched my mother get hit by her boyfriend.

Again long story short- I ended up getting beaten in the end. This time for telling a high school guidance counselor that I was having issues. My mother started threatening me with foster care, around the same time I was kicked at by a high school classmate, for refusing oral sex in front of his friends.

My mother's response was to encourage my brother to beat me for being a "*****." Then try to dump me at a mental hospital.

I think about 8 years later I got my brother's side of the story. He claims my mother told him to do it, and this much I do believe since she assisted him in beating me.

I told my brother about the classmate kicking at me for refusing sexual activity, and how one of his friends (my brother's) watched this all go down.

My brother told me I was wrong for believing I was raped, or whatever happened. He said I should forgive his buddy for watching it all happen, and just forget about it.

Now does that sound like one abuser making an excuse for another abuser, or is it just me.

As a result of this violence I felt I was marked for bullying because I was so emotionally out of sorts afterwards. It seemed that people just freaked at me because I appeared angry all the time. They'd make up rumours that I called people names or made me sound like some badass who would beat them all up. It was so lame.

But what it seemed like is people wanted me to be responsible for their cruel behavior. Like when I got angry they would cite I am just mean and not that they were cruel or ridiculous to begin with. I'd like to see how they'd react to going through that. It's like they were afraid of what I was going through so instead of trying to be nice, they'd react ****** to try to diminish what this experience was like by either discounting me as a person, or by making me sound bad and unworthy. And worse yet making me seem like I asked for it.

And this cruelty was mostly by other women.

So again, to make a long story short, anybody can be cruel, male or female, and at times they take equal parts in it.

my2catsZF my2catsZF
36-40, F
May 21, 2012