Ib Problems

Okay, so I'm one of those people who is a perfectionist in terms of shooting for all A's on a report card. With IB, it's really hard to do that. Although I'm getting all A's and 2 A- grades, it's not quite the grades that bug me, but what I feel the program is doing to my mental health. I have never in my life felt so unmotivated, stressed, frustrated, and hopeless before the IB came into my life. I honestly don't know what to do. I'll go to do a project, then procrastinate like heck on it because I just don't want to do it and I keep telling myself that I'll fail. Nothing seems to help. I really wish I could quit, but I'm not zoned for the IB school I go to, so I'd have to go to the crappy school I am zoned for. I hate this program and I really wish someone would have told me the truth about how much it sucks. I wish I could have just chosen AP, because although those classes are hard and can be a good amount of work, the work is meaningful and not nearly as tedious. Also, AP exams are a lot easier for me. I don't know. Just... grahhhhh. X((((
An Ep User An EP User
2 Responses Jan 12, 2013

You are lucky to be talented enough to have all A's. Last week, I tried selling my soul to Satan to become more intelligent. I am also an IB [health science] student and I have been feeling suicidal since school started. For someone who have had symptoms of depression and anxiety for many years, going to class, doing my homeworks and studying for all the science subjects are the most painful things. I am constantly reminded that I am a failure and that I will fail no matter what I do. Working with geniuses who actually have brains unlike me is a devastating reality. I am considering suicide daily and I don't think I will survive this semester. The last one was bad enough... I was stuck with a teacher who hated me. I wish my mom did some research before throwing me in this Lake of Fire.

What all subjects are you taking?