Not A Fan Of This State Whatsoever

Being an open minded, educated person from Detroit, Michigan, with experience in small town living and small town “personality” around Michigan, I moved to Iowa believing Americans are Americans no matter where you go.  I was dreadfully wrong.  A distinct culture exists in Iowa, and despite their impressive standardized test scores and commitment to their various religious faiths, overall, these people are culturally 20 years behind in terms of cultural sophistication and equality.  Racism, sexism, misogyny and hate toward children is subtle and unchecked, and if you challenge them to examine how their actions are hateful they blindly deny it and insist YOU took it the wrong way.  Apparently the river DENIAL runs through this state as well. 

Here is a brief list of the highlights of my almost 6 years in Iowa:

I have been ridiculed for my last name, insulted for the way I dress at work,

Insulted for being a woman and told that I was probably the best candidate for a job that was many levels past my position because they wanted a diversity candidate;

A group of stay at home moms harassed me when I passed out - from sheer exhaustion of raising a baby, working full time, and going to school - on the way back home from a supposedly friendly “girls night out.”  They took pictures of themselves making fun of me and posted it on a social networking site. 

One guy physically came after me, violently threw a chair into my door, for making friendly jokes about how the men in Iowa don’t know how to dress; 

I have been personally attacked at work for not having the information I needed to do my job (Iowans play mind games with information, they believe the more they have and the less they give makes them superior);
I have been completely ignored by men at work who are in leadership positions, after asking them a question, because they believe they are superior;

All of my performance reviews at work attacked me for my “professional” behavior and stated absolutely nothing about my skills except that I still do not meet the requirements to be paid equitably;

I’ve had to listen to my neighbor scream at his wife every Saturday morning for not cutting the grass right, using the F bomb, they also had a 2 year old daughter; I’ve had to tolerate the same neighbor out with his supposed mistress (gotta love small town livin’);

I’ve witnessed time and time again, Iowans screaming at their children, horrifically, out in public;

I was called a “fat pig” at 8 months pregnant by a supposed “friend” who my husband fought to keep around out of desperation for friends in Iowa;  same guy snorts coke in his kids’ treehouse and blows his paycheck at the ***** club, screams at his wife while banging his chest demanding respect

Do not talk about progressive issues like women or people of color in leadership positions - people will attack that person and undermine their leadership skills by claiming they are not qualified.  They are hypocritical liars who claim they want progress, but then crack jokes and make cutting remarks behind peoples’ backs. 

Every African American I met at my workplace, except one who has the patience of a saint, left even before they could get vested. 

I have been scammed by the Zimmerman dealership in Cedar Rapids, and absolutely patronized by the Manager there – Gary Banks.  After calling them out on over charging me and deception, they proceeded to deny it, ridiculed me in the next room whispering and giggeling to each other like the emotionally stunted immature ******** that most Iowan men are, when Gary decided he didn’t get enough of the ridicule and came into the payment booth after I agreed to pay it, and proceeded to harass and insult me in front of the entire office.  That guy is a sexist *******. 

I have been treated with total and absolute hatred by a group of women I worked with in the same office, who believed that because I was different I was just a “*****,” and further felt they were entitled to be superior to me, not because of their education and experience, but because they had been working the same department longer than me.  The women are hypercompetitive, sexist, narcissistic and hateful.
One woman I knew mentioned how she forced her daughter to clean and do laundry, but did not force her son, because her daughter “needed to learn this kind of stuff.” 

There is documented evidence of women being paid unequally at one of the largest employers in the state. 

I have seen young attractive women with very little experience get promoted into high paying leadership positions, above older women with far more experience in the domain of knowledge.
I have been left angry messages from an animal shelter program, after I had issues with a dog I took in and realized she needed to be in a larger area.  They didn’t even want to talk to me or counsel me, they just started in with angry hateful messages.

Rumors constantly circulated about men in management positions having sex with their subordinates at my work.  All of them married with children, of course.

Don’t expect friendliness to happen longer than 5 minutes.  After that, you’re just a non-Iowan who needs to adapt. 

The place is littered with passionless alcoholics.

This is just the tip of the iceburg.  All I can say is if you are considering moving there, even if its for the economic security, don’t consider it.  I thought I could “deal”, I thought I could handle small town thinking.  But in the end, it destroys your soul to compromise living with arrogant, ignorant people, who eat ****** food, have no sense of beauty, form or culture, hate people who are different than them, and make a mockery out of diversity.  There are a few Iowans who represent the element of humanity that states that fundamentally we are good people – and I have no idea how they stay so happy.  The state has lovely pastoral elements, but the land is raped of its natural resources, and all the flooding and leakage of pesticides into the Mississippi proves this.  Overall, Iowa is best left to the Iowans.
miomao miomao
7 Responses Aug 11, 2010

You sound like a huge crybaby. I can see how you would miss the culture and acceptance the great city of Detroit offers, meetings with a few a holes shouldn't form your opinion. Your leadership obviously lacks by the way you blame others for your problems.

I took a job in a small town and ended up leaving the job after less than a year due to the petty, bitchy, backstabbing nature of my coworkers. Lazy, middle-aged, Iowa women who resented me for actually doing my job and trying to improve the place, made them look bad. And they don't take kindly to outsiders-I was born here but haven't lived here in decades.

I completely understand how you feel about Iowa. I agree with you how a lot of the people are here. the majority of the people are racist biggets who definitely need a reality check. I'm sorry for your misfortune in the state of Iowa. but let me tell you I've lived here my whole life thank God I have the opportunity to move around. I've been to many states that have welcomed me with a positive attitude. but not everyone in Iowa what is the way you described. living here my whole life has not been good to me. they have been rude to me dishonest and sexist. one day I will be moving permanently out of the state of Iowa and I will never look back. I hope wherever you end up with welcomes you with a good attitude and a fresh outlook. good luck to you in life.

As a native Iowan, I'm disappointed to see what you've experienced. I have met a lot of people in Iowa, and in other states and countries. I can honestly say I've experienced what you have experienced - but not just in Iowa. There are good people everywhere in this country, and others. There are also people who can stand to learn a lot, and have a lot to be ashamed of in their behavior. Iowa is one of the most diverse states in the country, with one of the most Senior Republican Senators (and the most conservative), and one of the most liberal (Tom Harkin). That split reflects the state itself, which has a conservative western half, and a more liberal eastern half, but especially in college towns like Iowa City. You can see this contrast in things like the Iowa Supreme Court ruling in favor of gay marriage, yet some groups pushed for removal of those justices from the bench. We have a long history of equal rights, but there are plenty of sexist people around, such as the ones you mentioned. Best wishes to you, whether you stay in Iowa or not.

If you don't like it, then leave. Because nobody likes it when a gay-*** retard trashes their homestate on the internet, you ******* *****.

You're right, but enough with the language.

Iowa is awesome.

im from boston,been here in iowa city and cedar rapids for 6 years,all stories and articles about this is true, seems like mostly transplants u can make a friend with, need to kick it?

Having lived in and around one of the "big" cities in Iowa since I was16 I have to agree. My wife has lived here all her life and wants nothing more that to get out of this state. So far we have found very few people who really care about anything other that there own lives. For a state that so dependent on farming few of the future farmers we have met have any care to learn how to raise something other than corn or in some other way than pouring chemicals on it .