How To Take Everything Personally In AustraliaThe key to understanding Australians is the realization that they take everything personally. Everything. Every comment, every opinion, every obscure observation bears a relationship to the self that other cultures don't experience. Here's a hypothetical conversation to illustrate my point:
SWARTHY STRANGER WITH FUNNY ACCENT: Gordonya Mayt, you're havink flat tyre.
RELAXED, EASY-GOING AUSSIE: Whaddayamean I've got a flat tyre? Ya avin' a go at me, mate?
SWARTHY STRANGER WITH FUNNY ACCENT: No, just sayink. It not good for your car drivink with flat tyre, and you wearink grooves in road.
SEPPO WITH AMERICAN ACCENT: Hey dude, he's right, you've got a flat tyre.
RELAXED, EASY-GOING AUSSIE: Shut the eff up mate. It's none of your business. If I want to drive around with a flat tyre, I will. Shut the eff up, Seppo, go home, arrogant yank! And you you wog, if you don't like it here, go back where you came from... we're full!
Slightly exaggerated and tongue-in-cheek, but I'm sure we realize where we're going with this. Aussies take EVERYTHING personally. You may not see it, because these things lie beyond mere words. And they are always telling you to be relaxed and easy-going, and so it must seem to you that they are oh-so-relaxed and easy-going. So you imagine them to be on a higher Nirvanic plain of easy-goingness and karmic relaxedness. They live according to a secret code, a special bond, to which you, as a lowly visitor from another country, are not privy. You think it's about mateship, and you think that it just requires a little more time for you to settle in before you can inhale its exquisite mystery... but there's something else that eludes you, that you can't quite put your finger on. And if you look carefully, there seems to be a fly in their precious ointment... if you are alert, it might begin to dawn on you that they perceive the world to always revolve around them. EVERYTHING is always all about them. Aussie Aussie Aussie! oi! oi! oi! Me! me! me! Look at me! Notice me! Don't insult me! Don't criticize me!
'Nuff said. Aussies are the most balanced people in the world... they have a chip on both shoulders.
And you Seppos also need to stop projecting... just because Aussies are always reminding you that they are relaxed and easy-going does not mean that they are relaxed and easy-going. And when they tell you to stop being so uptight and taking things so seriously, perhaps it is they that are projecting.
Have a nice day :)
seatbelthoon 41-45, M 10 Responses 5 Sep 24, 2012