I Hate Making The First Move
So, on multiple sites, I have 'friends' circles. And there are a lot of people in those circles. And most of those people, I never ever hear from. Why are they there? So it got me thinking. Am I supposed to be responsible for maintaining the connection with EVERYONE??? Holy hell. "making the first move" just took on a whole new meaning. I was going to post this in the "I HATE People" group, but it seems to fit much better here.
I think I'm the most boring, unattractive and NOT-interesting person on the planet. It isn't just making the first move with a date, but with everything. My grandmother just underwent a double mastectomy (and she refused the implants and cosmetic reconstruction). She's my grandmother. Could anyone call me to tell me that my 85 year old grandmother with Stage 2 breast cancer survived the fricken surgery??? Of course not. So, I had to hunt people down. Talk about frustrating 'first moves.' After ten different voice messages to ten different people with no response, I was left saying, "did gramma live?" ten more fricken times. (And, by the way, yes she did survive, and doing quite well. Onto the Chemo...)
Move onto friends. Maybe I'm a sucktastic friend. I don't know. I do my best to be there for my friends throughout the good and the bad. Still, I only have these folks reaching out to me when they need something. Great. What's going to happen the next time I say 'no' to their request? It's not like I hear from them NOW. I don't hear from people, so what, am I supposed to be the one calling them all the time? My life is so boring and unfulfilled that I need to spend that kind of time making the first move, reaching out to everyone? Of course not.
At least I do have one truly good friend. Maybe that's more than most people get, though I doubt it. Especially checking out other people's profiles. Most people have over 100 friends. There's this joke that I love, it goes something like this: a good friend will bail you out of jail; a GREAT friend will be sitting beside you in the cell. I'm glad you have an easier time making friends, Kas,...otherwise, we wouldn't have anyone to bail us out!!!
I think I'm the most boring, unattractive and NOT-interesting person on the planet. It isn't just making the first move with a date, but with everything. My grandmother just underwent a double mastectomy (and she refused the implants and cosmetic reconstruction). She's my grandmother. Could anyone call me to tell me that my 85 year old grandmother with Stage 2 breast cancer survived the fricken surgery??? Of course not. So, I had to hunt people down. Talk about frustrating 'first moves.' After ten different voice messages to ten different people with no response, I was left saying, "did gramma live?" ten more fricken times. (And, by the way, yes she did survive, and doing quite well. Onto the Chemo...)
Move onto friends. Maybe I'm a sucktastic friend. I don't know. I do my best to be there for my friends throughout the good and the bad. Still, I only have these folks reaching out to me when they need something. Great. What's going to happen the next time I say 'no' to their request? It's not like I hear from them NOW. I don't hear from people, so what, am I supposed to be the one calling them all the time? My life is so boring and unfulfilled that I need to spend that kind of time making the first move, reaching out to everyone? Of course not.
At least I do have one truly good friend. Maybe that's more than most people get, though I doubt it. Especially checking out other people's profiles. Most people have over 100 friends. There's this joke that I love, it goes something like this: a good friend will bail you out of jail; a GREAT friend will be sitting beside you in the cell. I'm glad you have an easier time making friends, Kas,...otherwise, we wouldn't have anyone to bail us out!!!
By:
deleted
Age:
26-30
1
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