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I Hate My Alcoholic Husband

Hate My Drunk Husband

By: An EP User
Written on February 15th, 2013
My husband is an alcoholic. He stops drinking for months but then will go on a binge where he drinks until he passes out. His mannerisms and behaviors while drunk REPULSE me. I cannot stomach having him in my sight. When he is out, I cringe thinking that he is walking in instead of being out all night. We are 33 and have been together for 18 years. I just recently got to this point that I cannot stand it. I used to say that i wanted him to come home at night so i know where he is and safe, now i dread that door opening and him stumbling in. I don't even care where he goes or who he is with. Believe me, this is a huge deal for me. i have been in love with him for more than half my life. I yell at him when he is drunk in front of the kids because I can't control my anger and contempt for him. But my oldest (4) doesn't know daddy is drunk so he just sees me as the lunatic screaming. This makes me so sad and upset. My boys are the reason I won't put up with it anymore. Jut needed to get that out, I feel like I can't tell anyone anything as I fear they will hold it against my husband. He's a great man when sober, the kindest person you can meet. Someone I truly love, but not sure im even in love with anymore. Thanks for listening.
By: An EP User
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3 responses
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    llr55
    llr55

    I have been married to an alcoholic husband for 33 years. I identify with your story. I was so repulsed by him I moved into the other room. Of course it was all me. My 4 daughters have been humiliated by there father and tolerate him but try to stay away from him. He creates too much drama. After counseling I decided that this was a very destructive relationship so I filed for Divorce. I have gone through a lot since I filed. He has found out he is bipolar an that he had many of his problems before we ever knew each other. This has created 2 businesses that failed, a marriage and has taken a great tole on me. I can't seem to get past all of the affairs, drugs and who knows what else. I gave up my life for this man to succeed and I have lost who I am. Get counseling for yourself. Make yourself strong. Take care of yourself and children. The effect he has on them can be very negative if something doesn't change. I am 55 and am completely starting over. Don't let yourself get where I am.

    Mar 30
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    cheryl50
    cheryl50

    Reach out and get some proper help for you, your husband, your family, otherwise you will loose him to the bottle, for whatever reason he is abusing alcohol. Is it a selfish choice or a true illness he has now? To get to the answer you have to go to the right places. Its your only answer, so don't wait,- your kids love him and you do too otherwise you wouldn't have made that post. Your heading is screaming you are in emotional turmoil and pain. The Al-non groups can help you and AA groups can help your husband, but he has to be open and willing to go and listen, if he isn't then you go to the Al -anon for your sanity. And let him read what you wrote here it may be your beginning to getting him better and saving your family.

    Feb 17
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    neuilly
    neuilly

    The sad truth is, you can't make some one stop drinking. You can encourage them to go to AA. I have friends who were able to quit drinking and get their life back because of AA. But that was their effort and determination that got them there. No one else made them do that.

    And so, now you have to decide ....what about you? You deserve better. Sadly, your spouse is not able to offer that. You have some major decisions to face.

    Feb 15
    2 likes