Im Just Upset.

 My best friend and I are coming up on our 3rd year of friendship. the first 2 years were great, we were inseparable. This year the tables turned as she and i drifted a little. We would text and talk here and there. But i could clearly see that we were not happy like we used to be. I miss her very much. She met new people that are into things that i don't like, so i tried to keep my distance so that maybe she would realize how good of a friend i was. I did everything for her, but she's the type of person who can never just be happy. its always something. When its just me and her, were the same old best friends. But when the new friends come along she is very different, yes i know that she is not a real friend if she is doing this, but the point is, we have been through a lot. and when i say a lot i mean it. I don't know what to do anymore, i think about just saying forget it i cant take it, but its hurts so bad when i think about it. She is a good person don't get me wrong, shes just going down the wrong path and shes the type that you cant change her mind, she just needs to figure it out. please help me anyone with a suggestion of what i should do. thanks.

overit214 overit214
4 Responses Feb 9, 2009

I understand where you're coming from too. <br />
My best friend of 12 yrs has changed too, but it wasn't sudden. Actually, I don't know if she has changed, or if I'm just waking up on who she has always been. <br />
The whole not picking up the phone issue is childish and actually its emotional abuse. Like Lalalara said, distance yourself. You told her your inner feelings & she threw it back in your face. If someone feels that he/she has the right to hurt you like that he/she isn't worth having in your life.

hmm well the same happend with my friend, she said im sorry and changed for a little bit then went back to her old ways. Its a hard situation. Well you say you have been friends for nearly three years, i see why its hard to break off a friendship after that long. If you are like me and seem to be putting the most effort into the friendship, try distancing yourself, but not so much that it looks like you are angry with them, and see how they react. I have been doing that latley and my friend noticed not even after a week as i usually am pretty attached to her. Try this for a while and im sure it will work.

Thank you for your comment, ive tried doing those things and nothing seems to budge. just yesterday we hung out and everything was going very smoothly ( it was just the 2 of us) then we met up with some friends and it all went down hill. i just left and she didnt even call me or anything to see if i was okay. I tried to call her today and now she isnt picking up the phone, she always seems to turn the situation around on me like its my fault..<br />

This is exactly like my friendship! I have been best friends with her for a bit over 5 years and have also been through alot but shes been changing since last year and it hasnt been the same. She also does the same when we are alone but acts different around our group of friends. My advice is try and talk to her, but make sure it dosnt sound emotionaly attached to you like "why dont you like me anymore" rather ask something like "is everything ok" and if they ask why say "i dont know, its just i noticed we arnt as close as we used to be", just make sure it dosnt turn into a full blown fight. That worked for me and it made her wake up and notice and if they say that what they are really thinking its a good thing because then you know where you stand. Hope this helped, stay strong i know its hard but coming from someone who is going through the same thing it can get better.