This Is The Real Me

Ever since I can remember I've always hated my love handles. Thank you mom and dad for teasing me when I was younger, thank you media for embedding it in my brain that women have to have the perfect body, thank you past boyfriends that have said cruel things about my body. I don't have an hour-glass or pear shape like most girls. I look like a frog. I've never been able to find jeans that fit me correctly because my waist is wider than my hips. Plus when I do wear pants that fit it just looks like that I have a muffin top even though that is my natural shape. I've wanted to cut my love handles off or have plastic surgery on them. I'm 5'2 and have been up and down with weight. From 185 to 113 is where I'm at now. No butt , a pooch for a stomach, scars on my body from surgeries, and saggy breasts from the weight gain and lost, all at age 24. I can't even have intimate moments without a shirt on. I can't undress in front of anyone, because I'm so ashamed of my body and of how I look. If I don't love myself how can I expect someone to love me? I know my flaws at least most of them, so I point them out, and I don't expect anyone to love them, because I hate them.
xoxsagmpxox xoxsagmpxox
22-25, F
2 Responses Nov 26, 2012

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I feel the same way as you do girl... Its very hard for us women to be accepting of ourselves. Anytime I see a thinner pretty girl I always compare myself to them... It is exhausting to live this way... I have just started on this site and I am hoping that sharing with other people helps me overcome this way of living. If you ever want to talk, shoot me a msg :)