Soo Bad!!!

I truly hate my boyfriend… I wish I could leave but I can’t cosue I’m scared to death by him.  
I feel like I’m being raped everytime he touches me, I hate the way he looks at me, undresses me with his eyes, I can’t find the love in there only the hunger for a woman body…my body.
 I hate how he comes home drunk every weekend.
I hate how he makes me undress down to my underwear infront of his friends just to show of. I hate how he treats me like a hooker and calls me a ****.
I hate how he demands me to do everything in the house.
There’s a LOT more reasons to why I hate him so bad now the reason I’m scared to death and hates him the most for is that he hits me. Actually he doesn’t just hit me he beats me up till I’m lying on the floor almost unconsciously.
Every time I hear someone walking through the door, I get anxious my brain automatically shuts down and I’m not me any more I’m just a robot. I have to do so, just to manage to look at him and behave “normal”. I’m living in fear all the time, I never relax not even at night couse I’m scared he’ll have a nightmare wake up and blame me for it. Which usually means being drag out of bed , slammed against the wall, being almost showed down the stairs, then frown back to bed when I get up to the bedroom. The only time he’s careful with me is when we have sex, I’m not saying making love couse it’s not making love it’s just sex.
I can’t run from him and I can’t hide. My body is sore and tired, I want to escape but I don’t know how and I’m WAY to scared
MissySaysRawr MissySaysRawr
18-21, F
3 Responses Oct 10, 2011

check out You need support. Find a womens shelter. Confide in a counselor or trusted friend. Seek help and get out.

Your "boyfriend" is a rotten, ******-up, pathetic piece of **** unworthy of breathing. This is ABUSE, this is something you go to JAIL for. You HAVE to get out of this, if you just look you'll find plenty of places to call, most likely places to stay at as well, and if you can't find anything go to stay with someone you know, family, friends ANYTHING as long as you get away from this guy before he hurts you again! It will only get worse from here, I've seen this story far too many times to believe differently. I've seen crushed skulls and ribcages and mutilation and worse. PLEASE, get out of this in any way that you can!

Thanks, and i'm trying

oooh yes you can!!!!!<br />
Do you wanna stay till something really bad happens??<br />
I'm not saying, it's already bad what you goin thrue..... But it will get worse!<br />
Cause he thinks now, he can do whatever he wants with you!!!<br />
You better leave before it's to late!!!<br />
Like dominiquewatson said, there's abuse lines, make pics how you look like after he beats you up...<br />
do everyting you can, talk to someone you can trust!<br />
Please don't give up!!!!!!!!