The Sun Shines Out His A**

We met in kindergarten, I loved him since then, and we were long distance until college. We've been together 5 years, and the whole time I've been asking him for the only thing I've ever wanted--him. I want to marry him and raise a family with him, but here's the catch--I don't think he does. He wants to be financially secure first, so he went off to grad school in a country halfway around the world (literally, the time difference is 8 hours) and he'll be there for two years! Meanwhile, I graduated, can't find any work, am barely making ends meat covering rent and my loan bills, and I have no idea how to move forward into a career. He, on the other hand, is doing everything he ever wanted. He couldn't be happier, unless I were there also. He has everything he wants, and it all fell to his lap through luck and a bit of charm on his part. While I am scared every day that I won't make enough to cover rent and be on the streets, broke, and alone. I hate him, because if he cared about me, about us, more than his ambitions, I wouldn't be as stuck and confused and exhausted as I am now. I'm more than jealous of him for his accomplishments, I'm angry that he's happy over there, and has the gall to say I'm just making excuses and that I have options. I've been looking for work for the past 5 months, and there is not much out there that can cover rent plus 600/month in loans. I feel so screwed, and I hate him for not being here screwed with me.
An Ep User An EP User
Jan 10, 2013