I think this story is at the pinnacle of horrible stories...

Looking back 8 months ago, I can't believe I actually agreed to this living situation. I am currently living in a 2 bedroom apartment with my bf and his 29 year-old brother. Obvious issues, I am a clean-freak and they are not.

I love my bf but things are getting quite rocky because of his brother. It is a difficult step moving in with somebody else, let alone having to take that journey with an annoying brother. His brother is starting to freak me out in that he has not had a g/f in over 7 years. He has been unemployed for a few years, plays online poker every day, and in his spare time ays call of duty on playstation.... not to mention he plays at 3 a.m with volume up high leaving me to fall asleep having to feel like I am in Iraq.

I have told him to turn the volume down countless times, he does... but not enough for me to be able to sleep. I am a light sleeper.

My bf and I purchase everything for the apartment, toilet paper, cleaning products, furniture, bathroom soap, tissues. He even uses our food occasionally. My dilemma is, this is my bf's brother, I know somebody has to set him in his place and tell him to stop being a sponge but I am not sure it is my place to say anything. I certainly don't want to come off looking like a *****, however I also do not want to be a doormat.

My plan is to shut my mouth, eventually my bf will get tired of his brother's crap without me complaining to him and starting an argument. His brother will be our common enemy instead of me being theirs.

I find it slightly creepy at all that his brother is living with a young couple?? I feel he resents me for taking away his drinking buddy. He is constantly asking my bf to go to the bar with him, doesn't say you guys or pretend to notice I am there. My bf just says he will ask me or says no for the both of us.

We had a huge blow-out the other night, his brother obviously heard through our paper thin walls, instead of giving us some along time, he drags his brother our to the bar with him.


studyingpolitics101 studyingpolitics101
18-21, F
7 Responses Feb 28, 2010

I totally know how you feel, I've been with my fiancé for 14 years and 9 years ago his brother moved in with us , treated me like **** , never cleaned , never paid a bill . In the end the stress was so great I moved out and my fiancé and I took a break. Now 9 years later we decided to give it a try again. No luck again... I'm getting ready to move out. His brother never changed , never and my fiancé just sticks up for him every time . We will see if after this week if I'm still here and still engaged . Good luck and hopefully your ending is better

OMG I can relate to every single one of these posts. I live with my boyfriend and his 18 year old brother... Who is constantly treating me like a child. It's frustrating because I am, of course, much older than him. Take care of the house, constantly end up cleaning up after him, put up with their crap and still, I get left out. It's like I am third wheel. I am pretty sick of it. I hate how they both think it's fine to gang up on me and tease me. It's a very frustrating situation. And now... My boyfriend has started ask his brother to come with us to a lot of couple and adult activities!!! It's annoying.
And yes I am aware that he is 18 and technically an adult but his behavior is far from it.

Studyingpolitics101, <br />
I hope you've solved your problem by now! A friend of mine had the same problem but he is the guy and he had issues with his brother staying with him and his gf. In the end, his gf gave him the ultimatum (she didn't make a huge drama out of it, just told him sternly it's either his bro or she leaves... in the end, my friend asked his brother to leave; now, the brother lives in the apartment building next door! Hooray for my friend and his girlfriend!)<br />
Perhaps to make you feel better... My boyfriend's brother just introduced his close female friend to my boyfriend when we had a small argument a few weeks ago! I don't know how introducing a girl would help solve our argument. And we've been dating for 6 months... some guys have really bad EQ.

I'm in the same situation. I totally feel like a third wheel. I've been living with my boyfriend for a little over seven months and his brother comes over for weeks at a time. Everytime he comes over he asks my boyfriend "why does she have to be here" or "can't she go to a friends house" like, wtf. Are you ******* serious? IT'S MY HOUSE. NOT YOURS. What makes it even worse is that I'm just supposed to bite my tongue. Whenever I try to stand up to him for disrespecting me, my boyfriend tells me not to talk to his brother like that. And when me and my boyfriend fight, it's like he WANTS to watch. We have to tell him to leave whenever we get into it, or else he'll just sit there and instigate it. I literally loathe my boyfriends brother. Im really concerned that its going to break us up.

Lol this Fucken crazy .. My bfs ***** of a brother is 21 never held a job n when he did decide to just for fukn 3 days n he was tierd his dumbass parents baby him like he's 3 wtf is thiss?? N he's super dissrespectful . We got n to it last night n I sure hit him where it hurts.

OMG. Living wit certain types of people KILLS relationships. Me and my boyfriend have lived with his brother for 9 months. It almost destroyed our relationship. I am so glad we decided to forgo having a car right now in order to rid ourselves of this issue and make US better. His brother acts like men make all the ******* decisions and I have no input. His girlfriend of almost seven years does not live with him. He is filthy bastard and I hate living here. Sometimes I feel like a third wheel. I hate him so much I don't even like to talk in front of him, or to him. I literally was JUST ******* talking to my boyfriend about our new place and he came downstairs and interrupted our whole conversation. So now I'm upstairs listening to their loud music and wanting to punch him in the face. Everybody in my bf's family (well, all the younger boys and this older brother who happens to be almost thirty) are wannabe rappers and producers. My boyfriend was on that **** for awhile but it is just a hobby for him. He wants to be a computer engineer, but his brother is constantly trying to push him into producing. I'm like Why? So he can live a laissez faire lazy existence like you? Never able to hold up a steady job, even though you have one and a half degrees? WTF? He never even tries to include me in any kind of planning that affects me and my bf. No, we're not married. But we still want a life together. <br />
<br />
I will NEVER ******* live with him again. Ever. You couldn't pay me. I have picked up all his things and washed his dishes like he is my child. No more. We move July 1st. One more month of this BULLSHIT.

I am in the same situation!!! I am living with my bf and his messy brother who plays video games/hogs the TV, never cleans the kitchen or bathroom, etc. He rarely cleans up after himself and he is 27 years old!! He has been living at home with his parents and I think has never had to pay for anything or clean anything in his life. It is so irritating!!! He also takes time that I could be spending with my boyfriend to go to movies with him or to karate classes or to talk about biking and computers. I feel like I am now the third person in the relationship. I am so happy to hear that I am not the only one experiencing this! He has talked about living with us in a condo when we move to a new city, but it's NOT going to happen!