I Hate My 11 Years Old Disrespectful Daughter

Her Father spoiled her rotten and now if I don't give her own way she goes into a rage! I told him to STOP SPOILING HER. She hits me, screams at me, pushes me and I am fed up! I can't stand her. She is my biological child. I have tried therapy and she refuses to go.

I need help verry badly!~ If anyone has any suggestions for me please help me. I am no longer enjoying life, I feel like she is a leach. I have given her my love 100% and she is a spoiled rotten *witch*!!

I have started IGNORING HER and I can no longer tolerate her. I want to give custody to her Father but he *wants her to go to which parents she wants to go with* and that is sadly me. I can't figure why she wants to live with me. We don't get along and I am depressed.

Any suggestions, please contact me ASAP!



Hatemy11yearold Hatemy11yearold
41-45, F
10 Responses Sep 10, 2012

I feel like I am in the same boat I left my ex 7 yrs ago and when I left I left her with him BC he said he would kill me if I did but he spoiled her and let her get away with everything ( abusive for 6 yrs ) anyway and came to live with me but she yells and hits and calls him when I am mean and instead of helping me like coparenting he is a *******. I can't stand my own kid . I an attempted to send her back to him but he has no job and does drugs and is homeless

Take your daughter on a historic tour---to a good, old-fashioned wood shed. Do it every time she acts up.

I do not have a directional suggestion, however, I do feel your pain because I am depressed too. I hate being a mom on lock down to an ungrateful little bully! I have no life and when she is around she makes my life hell, I even dread it when I pick her *** up from after care. Whew!

She wants to live with me because her I have a nice house with a pool and cable and tons of kids are over here all the time. Her Dad has a * BACHELOR PAD* which is not very nice. My best friend has suggested giving a her a couple of really good spankings with the belt.

I had to call the police a few weeks ago because she ran down the street because she didn't want to do the dishes!!!! The police said they would spank her.

try the "total transformation" cds from James Lehman. I have a 13 year old boy...disrespcetful with ADHD. just started this series, and first thing it tells you as that the parents have some changing to do....then how to parent the child you have, not the one you wish you had...it is a hard day by day struggle....but must have faith that God will pull us throuhg!

I am going to look it up right now!! Thank you!!!!!

I have kicked my daughter out yesterday and told her to go live with her dear Dad because she hit me after I took her phone from her bed. I am fed up with her disrespect towards me only! I am happy she is at her Dad's.

I know exactly how you feel cause I am in the same boat with my 12 (13 on Sunday) year old daughter. I have her in Counseling but it is not working. The older she gets the worse she is getting. Just last night we had it out and she pulled my hair, kicked me, smacked me, threw things at me and called me everything under the sun. I called the sheriffs dept and made a police report on her. I am over it and just want her gone. I know that sounds mean but she is driving me crazy and is tearing our family to pieces. My 6 year old son cries cause he is scared of her when we argue. She calls him a piece of **** d*ck. I am so depressed over her. I want to send her to juvenile I am so over her. She is only getting worse as she gets older. Please pray for me and I will pray for you....

I spoke to a police officer and he said if my daughter hits me or kicks me I can have her taken to *jail*. What that means is that they police will come and take her to juvi and then they will call you to come get her. I am thinking the shock of that will straighten her up. Her therapist said it is best to get her behavior on record so when you get ready to *beat her butt* it is on record that she was violent to you. Good luck, I am saying an extra prayer for you.

I know exactly how you feel cause I am in the same boat with my 12 (13 on Sunday) year old daughter. I have her in Counseling but it is not working. The older she gets the worse she is getting. Just last night we had it out and she pulled my hair, kicked me, smacked me, threw things at me and called me everything under the sun. I called the sheriffs dept and made a police report on her. I am over it and just want her gone. I know that sounds mean but she is driving me crazy and is tearing our family to pieces. My 6 year old son cries cause he is scared of her when we argue. She calls him a piece of **** d*ck. I am so depressed over her. I want to send her to juvenile I am so over her. She is only getting worse as she gets older. Please pray for me and I will pray for you....

she is 11 years old put your foot down and take her to a specialist you are the mother she has no right to say no in terms of medical treatment. She probably wants to stay with you because she wont be able to act same to her dad. I have a 20 year old son who thinks he owns the right to drive my car anytime he wants and I have no say in it. He has been acting this way since he was little he has rights and I have none. Today he asked me if I needed the car because he would be late for the class. He was out last night and came home at midnight from a movie. He is a biomed student he should be responsible and come home early. because he went to bed late he could not wake up early. he was upset when I told him no he cannot borrow my car. He has a buspass and the bus stops right nfront of the school. he just said fine than I will be late for class I said NOT MY PROBLEM GET USED TO IT. he shows attitude if the car sits in the drive way and I dont give him the car. Well may be he should stop eating outside everyday and save money to buy one. I understand your pain my husband spoiled my son he would yell at me infront of my kids and tell me not to ever yell at them. I could not discipline them ( I am not talking about hitting) in front of him if My son cried he would just tell me to give them what he wants. Men are ******** put your foot down and say no to her. If she screams and yells at you ignore her and tell her you will listen when she stops screaming than just walk away. be strong if she has no mental problems she will realize that in time no means no. Talk to her ONLY when she is calm they throw tantrums to get your attention My son broke my window when he was 7 If I knew what I know today I would treat him differently. I have husband who thinks moms should serve their kids and their husband. he gets a ****** treatment from me and he takes it actually. I told him that he was nothing but a retarded SOB because he told me to sell my washer.I am not a bad person and I am nice to others but he is getting what he deserves and he knows it. Take her to a specialist and DO NOT LET HER SAY NO she is only 11 when she turns 12-13 she might start using drugs if she has problems you make the decitions not her you are her guardian she might have some anger issues with you talk to her and pay attention to when she is calm ONLY. I have been there and done that hopefully it helps let me know how it turns out I hope everything turns out ok for both of us

I don't agree with this group but you don't sound like you hate your child, you just sound desperat for help. After reading the part about her choosing to live with you and not her father even after all the spoiling he's done and even with all the arguments with you to me sounds like you need to try and talk to her honestly and openly. It sounds as if she had been abused in some way, leaning more toward sexualy abused . As a child I was and behaved in the same manner. Mine was diffrent as it was my brother not my father that abused me but I have read from other members in my group that when it's a father that abuses they tend to spoil them more then normal to keep the quiet. She may feel angry and emaressed by it and is acting out for someone to realize and help. She may refuse therapy but remember you are her mother, put your foot down and make her go, even if that means litterly dragging her into the building kicking and screaming. It will be tuff but it's obviouse there's a deeper issue. I wish you the best of luck.

I wish I could drag her into the building. Now her latest excuse is she * doesn't like the therapist*, so she refuses to go.

Since writing I have told her she is not to come to my house anymore if she is disrespectful to me. I packed her stuff up and sent her to her Dad's. She showed no remorse when I saw her yesterday. My life is so peaceful with just her sister and I.

She's 11. If she yells at you, spank her. The only "deeper issue" she has is that you seem to be doing nothing to discipline her. Back in my day, a kid that young never yelled at their parents because they would wind up with a sore behind. And btw, I was also abused as a child. My response to it was that I never crossed my parents because I was too afraid to. Sure, I was angry at them, but do you really think they feared my wrath? I was smaller than them and I wasn't allowed to express my anger, so I didn't. I swallowed it and did what they told me to. I don't advocate abusing kids because it makes them miserable and suicidal, but that's obviously not an issue when your daughter is yelling and cussing you out. According to today's definition, of course, my entire generation was abused, which is why we were all so much more respectful towards our parents than today's kids. I admit we didn't respect our parents because we thought our parents were the wisest creatures to grace the face of this planet. It was because they were bigger than us, and today we continue to respect our employers, not because we think they are the wisest creatures to grace this planet, but because they have the power to fire us. That's life. I was abused, even by the definition of my youth, back when it actually meant hitting, kicking, and punching the kid. Your daughter is just a brat. Spank her and, if she gets worse, spank her again. Back in my day, it was common knowledge that we could improve our behavior or go through life with a sore behind. Guess what we all chose? There's way too much psychoanalyzing of bratty kids these days.