Welcome To My Life

My dad is the kind of person who still believes that women are meant to serve the men. in my opinion its just b u l l s h i t. I mean come on.! He demands my respect and he says he is allways right. kinda like that movie matilda. " Im right and your wrong, im big and your small, and theres nothing you can do about it.". My dad grew up with a dad who had many wifes at once. So he is the same. My dad has my mom and he also has another wife with kids. he trades of on nights. one day he sleeps at our house and the next in his other house.

i have 1 step brother and 2 step sisters and in my opinion those kids can go F uck themselves including the ***** they call a mom. They are allways kissing a ss to my dad and allways do  what he wants and still call him Daddy.

Me, well im the one mistake my dad had. To tell the truth the only reason why he is allways talking down on me and cursin me out is because i wont lie down and take his **** like the rest of them. I feel like if i were to do everything he says like a little puppy, then i would be disrespecting myself. WHy do I have to do those things.? he comes home and makes me or my brother or sister take off his shoes while he sits on his a ss.  he makes me get him stu pid stuuff because he is too lazy to get it himself.  I mean. i dont have to take that, do I.?

Nothing i do is ever good enough for him. Im too fat or my hair isnt preety or long enough or my grades arent good enough. He is allways kicking me when im down..[emotionally]  I Was struggling in school because he made me transfer from my school in california to one in mexico. I had allways been a good student but now ive been getting A's B's and some C's. Still he says im dumb for getting those grades, when he didnt even finish high school. Hypocritical much.?

Im never allowed to go out at all. I go to school get home and then start all over monday thru friday. He says i should be home studying and not out being a party girl. But then he does let my dumb step siblings go out all they want. He comes home and only gives us 200 dollars, sometimes less. He gives us that each month for food and other expensives. We can bearly afford food with that. Its not that were poor, but its all because my dad spends all his money on going out with his new girlfriend. he also gives my stepbrother money to take out his girlfriend.

He is allways calling me fat and cursing me out. Sometimes i cant even look at him or i start crying.  i'm ussually a strong person. i dont let people bully me, or anything of what they say get to me. My dad is the only one capable of making me cry. and he makes sure of doing it every chance he gets. I swear  suicide has cross my mind so many times. But i would never ever do that.

Sometimes i really feel alone. Like no one gets what im going through. THe only person i really love and know i can trust is my best friend, who still lives in cali. If it werent for her, i think i would have gone insane by now. My mom wont even say i love you back to me. My family hates me becuase i dont respect my dad. THey think i should respect him even with the things he does.

they dont know what its like to be me. welcome to my life by simple plan is the soundtrack of my life. No one knows what its like to not belong or loved or understood. my parents dont love me, and no one understands me. To them i was just a mistake.

i just holp one day Karma comes back to kick my dad in the ***. He deserves everything he has coming. Once i turn 18 i wish i could run far away and never see them again but i know deep down i cant do that. WHy.? well because i just cant leave my brother and sister behind. With all this fu ckery that is my life.. its not their fault. I feel like i HAD to grow up to fast. being the oldest means i notice more of the things my dad does.  my dad took away my childhood and just  because he didnt have one either.

I dont know what to do... i really hate him but..... he is my dad.  is it right for me to hate him or am i just being dramatic like my whole family says so......... i dont know ...my life is just so out of control and i dont think i can put up with it much longer. my life is a nightmare.

KattMason KattMason
1 Response Jul 30, 2010

that's really sad! and you have evry right to hate him if he treats you and your family like that !! <br />
and how on earth does he have another wife and a girlfriend |:!!! <br />
i really do feel for you :/ can't you and your siblings go an talk to some one like a counseller of a social services worker ? if you can talk to them i think it would be better if you were to be brought up in a house where there is love and care and you can be a kid .<br />
i hope things get better for you soon , no one deserves to be treated that way.