I Seriously Don't Love Him

I hate my dad so much, I seriously don't care if anything bad happens to him. Matter of fact, I WANT something terrible to happen to him. He is the reason our family has conflicts...always. He is always the cause. I think it has something to do with.. He is the most difficult man who ever walked the earth. You think Im kidding. He lives to be difficult and to make everyone's lives miserable. That pathetic bastard. I really don't know how to describe him on here. There is just wayyyy too much to list. Here, I'll just try my best to describe him in 1 paragraph..

He is very slow with everything, not intellectually at all. He is in matter of fact, extremely smart..scary smart. His mom was a genius, if that tells you anything. I think he's so smart, it makes him slow...if that makes any sense. It takes him forever to do anything because he's such a perfectionist. It takes him forever to do ANYTHING because he has to sit there and digest every little thing. he dwells and dwells on things that would take the NORMAL person little or no time at all. He is a complete and utter tyrant. He abuses his power on our family. He's 6'4'' and has a booming voice when he yells. He legit scaressss me to death when he gets mad. (lately, I kinda haven't) He is very selfish & non-gentleman-like. He is a yankee...eww. He acts like he owns my mom, too. I love her so much... She has put up with so much but will endure him just for the kids. (sorry men, you do not ******* own women.) He'll get in these moods where i seriously think he's gone insane. He will literally cause a fight with everyone in our family and smile while he's doing it? Its so creepy I just want to kill him. He'll yell and cuss and all that jazz. We just all cower before him...like he's some king. And the thing is, he used to always be that way, but him and my mom got in a HUGE fight a few years ago and she threatened to leave him. He has for the most part, changed. He's built us a pool and stuff..but that doesn't change anything. He's such a hypocrite. We can NEVER turn the tv up loud because he gets mad and will YELL AT US? But he can turn it up as loud as he wants WHENEVER he wants? And 1 time, he called me a dumb-***. I cried so hard because I am a straight A student. I try so hard only for him..and then for him to call me a dumb ***? when I get perfect 100's on allll my math tests? helllll no. I don't play that game.

hahahahahahaha woooow perfect timing. My mom just asked if she could sleep in my bed because he was watching some concert in their room with it turned up loud..even though there's a tv in the living room...and she's trying to go to sleep? Oh but if WE ever did that, he would probably hit us!! Im not even kidding.

I really hate him right now because I want my own car. I HATE driving his old, digusting lexus. I go to a school where all the kids get new cars for their 16th birthday. I know that absolutely ridiculous because they're 16, but It would be nice to have a somewhat nice car? And here's the thing. My mom ******* OFFERED to buy me a car but he won't let her. Now thats where I get sooo pissed off. LET HER DO WHATEVER SHE WANTS WITH HER OWN MONEY YOU ****. He does not own her? like what the ****? And I get this: He won't let me get my own job to get my own car because he says I "should be studying for my act so I can get a scholarship." Why in the world should I do something he wants if I don't get what I want? It just doesn't work that way. He is so cheap I hate it. He loves ruining my life, and I hate him. OH and then he'll pull the whole "I didn't get a car till i was this old blah blah blah" card. Hahahaha even my mom stepped up and told him we live in an entirely different world than back then. Barely any teenagers had their own car back then!!!! He grew up in some middle-class blue collar family in ohio & barely got anything. Times have indeed changed!!!! He finds something wrong with every car i pull up for sale on the internet. Hahahahahaha that act can kiss my pretty little polish *** :)
TanBarbieGirlxox TanBarbieGirlxox
18-21, F
26 Responses Aug 2, 2010

My dad says he owns me and to bow down to him, he acts as if he is God, he never laughs or smiles, we can't have fun, we always are doing chores for him and he makes us sorcery thing for him, he says he owns my mum aswell

I know exactly how you feel my father gets on my nerves . he yells and screams for something that is not a big deal. He irratates my soul.

That ****** species who called themselves men or dad or whatever the ****? let me put it in the simplest way.they **** for fun without a thought on having babies.its their **** that they care about.and then after the whole **** happened theyll leave the whole ******* thing to be taken care of by their wives.because 'god says so,the community says so,its the wives job to raised kids'.but of course the ones with the complete authority to slave people around are they themselves,who else right? because they are superior.they are smarter and stronger.they are the source of money.BULLSHIT I SAY.heres for you innocent babies out there who thought maybe your love will change them.let me break it down for you honey.THEY WILL NEVER ******* CHANGE.these pile of ***** exist because of our never ending loves.we need to sort out who deserves our loves and who doesnt and ditch the undeserving ones forever.that will save a lot of tears and heartbreaks and stop the neverending patterns of abuse in your family and the generation after.Remember this girls and ladies,NO AMOUNT OF LOVE N RESPECT SHOULD BE GIVEN TO UNDERSERVING BASTARDS

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my father is the same, exept for the smart part. my father is just a stupid old man. who uses his lower body to think most of times. and who never takes fault for his mistakes.now about your problem. if you are old enough, I think you should move out. that's what I would do. find a part time job, a cheap place, and optain the freedom that you deserve. well, the conditions are not the best to study or live comfortably, but frankly I would sacriface my fluffy bed to get to choose my own way, what I car I want to drive, Damn. they won't let me choose my shampoo or better yet. my mother f@#$^g haircut .

I hate my dad too. He's so annoying doesnt know when to shut up. He doesn't even believe in me in anything I do. He's always a debby downer, complains about every stupid little thing. He's so embarrassing and loud. I understand that he may not have great hearing or whatever but like he always tells into the phone and yells at me, he doesn't use his inside voice. I'm 14 and I don't even want to live with him anymore. My mom even complains about him all the time! Sometimes I just want my parents to divorce so I can just live with my mom and not have to deal with my dad. He had no manners what so ever even if we tell him nicely he doesn't learn. He gets distracted so much and is a really bad driver. He's not even a good role model I would never want to look up to my dad. He is smart in only cars and things along that line. But he can't even spell properly. He calls me rude things and even if I try to tell my mom he denies it. He doesn't even know how to socialize. And whenever I want to get something none related to technology he says no. When it's technology there's a slim chance he says yes cause he's so into that. Once my mom told him to learn his manners at the table cause he was chewing with his mouth open and he's like stop giving me **** I should just move out. Like WTF is that suppose to mean?! When I heard him say that I all I could think of was him having an affair with someone cause aswell once I went on his phone on his text and I had no ideas who it was but for sure not a friend my mom knows cause it said something like are we still meeting do you need a ride? It really upset me when I read that if he's hurting doing something bad behind my moms back I would hate to see my mom get hurt cause she's so nice and she's like my bestfriend. Sometimes I think of putting my self in foster care but its probably worse. All I wish is just to get older get a good job save money and get the hell out of my house. I cannot deal with my dad. I always argue with him, he posses me off so much it's not even funny. I don't even want my friends to come over anymore because of him. Sorry you had to read this long *** paragraph but I finally just need to get my thoughts out somewhere.

I hate my dad. He is similar to yours. My dad is the biggest jerk ever. He's cheap, never buys me anything, calls me fat, ugly, stupid,*****, and he's even told me he hated me. I don't have any feelings towards him. I don't love him at all. I can't wait to leave the house and never have to see him or my mom or my stupid *** sister. I hate my family I truly hate them with a passion. They don't let me go out they don't help me with school they criticize me and call me names I always get yelled at and I just want to leave this house. As soon as I turn 18 I'm moving out changing my number moving far away and have zero contact with them. I HATE THEM they ******* ruin everything for me.

The thing that beats me the most is why we still care so much about someone who keeps bullying us enough to stop us from killing him. I have always dreamed of waking up without him on this earth, but it never happens. There's even a part of me that i'm afraid will regret his passing. Life just has to better without this abuse.

I have a dad like that parents are divorced and been that way for two years. I really wanna watch my dad suffer I almost walked up to him this morning and bkew his kneecaps off with a 12 gauge under my bed. I was ready to slice his throat like a pig and watch him squirm it would bring me delight. Or maybe just jab the knife dead in his chest.and cut through his body. Yes thats perfect id make him suffer. I want to kill his mom to but that will be fast justbslice her throat clean open id love it. Watch them choke on their own blood would bring me delight

I have a dad much like yours, I can hear him arguing with my mum as I write this. he treats the place like a dolls house with a 20 year long campaign of peace-meal DIY (for which we are supposed to be eternally grateful "I'm doing this for you" etc.) using his family as forced labour. its tough but I've decided the best thing I can do is completely ignore him. he will not change for love nor money and I have spent years trying. if you allow yourself to define your life as "messed up by my dad" then you are giving him power. the hardest part was accepting that my mum has made a choice to suffer the abuse; I'm physically stronger than my father and I look out for my mum when my dad is being aggressive but even with my help she refuses to do a thing about him. no firm rules, no affirmative action no professional help nothing. in years to come I will have to come back to all these issues and deal with them but unless I just ignore him then he holds me captive as a prisoner of my own mind having me lack the confidence to strike out alone (oddly exactly what he wants although he regularly threatens to kick me out)

I hate my sociopath dad too. He's the reason mom left us. He doesn't care if he ruin people's lives with his lies. He thinks he can fool people around by pretend kindness. The only reason I'm hanging around is to make sure he doesn't get too far. I understand why some people end up being manipulated by him. He's smart and and uses every opportunity to get ahead. At the end of the day, he's still my dad and partly my responsibility.

I used to be the kind of person Caitlyn described. Getting beaten so much but loved my dad so i didnt tell anyone. (I also got beaten by my mom several times when i was younger so i dont really love either of my parents). He could have killed me if he kept going. But i thought that everyone was getting the same thing i did. Until i asked someone if they hated their parents too. They said they couldnt live a day without seeing them. When was the last time theyd been beaten or shouted at for no reason. They said it happened ONCE when they were younger or never happened before. Thats when i realised that i had lived an abused childhood. I was constantly getting beaten by both of my parents until the 9th grade. ( my mom stopped when in 8th grade coz i had gotten to big for her to hurt me by then) My dad stopped because i had to go to the hospital because of his beating. I have a younger bro who doesnt get jack ****. The worst he gets is shoutings. I actually went to the hospital because my dad beat me for something my brother did. He is such a douche and all me friends hate him cos he insults everyone is a cocky ****. My whole family sucks. Someone noticed me bruised one day at school and asked me what happened. I told them and they told the school counselor. THANK GOD!! My dad could have killed me! I remember the first time my mom took my side was when my dad threw something at me and missed and got my mom instead. She was crying and started shouting at him saying what if that had hit me (which was his intention). I started seeing the school psychologist and they told my parents to stop the beating and the shouting. The problem is that those didnt hurt as much as the fact that it was my parents were the ones beating me. All the discouragement i had gotten from my mom and all the sh*t i'd gotten from my dad just drove me insane. Im a lot bulkier now and both of my parents stopped the beating. The shouting and insulting continues. All of my friends think my parents are crazy. I never loved or admired my dad. Never looked up to him. My grandparents were even the ones that taught me to speak and not my parents. When they found out about all the **** that happened in the family, they said if they had known, they would have adopted me. My dad always pulls out the i pay for everything card and is the only reason i cant run away or something like that. My dad gave me my first nosebleed, broken bone, heartbreak, beating, insult, etc. I never loved anyone in my family and always considered my friends as older brothers and sisters (they made me skip a grade so everyone in my grade is older than me). So Caitlyn, dont think that just coz u cant wear make up, u have it the worst. Even i consider myself lucky sometimes because i know that people have it worse than me. I take psychology and plan to major in counseling psychology to help people who went through what i did.

Caitlin, I hope you grow up to learn to empathise and respect other people's different life situations and emotions. Physical abuse is only one kind of abuse, what TanBarbiegirlxox has written up there is only a small part of what she experiences on a daily basis, I can say this with confidence because my father is exactly like hers. It can be very hurtful when someone you are supposed to love and repect, someone you are supposed to look up to and rely on - neglects that responsibility and instead punish you for their own incapabilities... We only hate them because we understand what it is they are doing to us, we are jealous of people who have a father like yours. Be thankful, but don't become smug, especially when one day you encounter a friend who needs you because they are experiencing something similar, and you say to them - "get over it, it's not that bad" - that is the last thing a person in our situation (or any other difficult situation) wants to hear.

Hey guys, (this is a little delayed, I'm sorry) I felt soooo much better reading yall's comments..except for the little bundle of joy up there who thinks the world is filled with rainbows and unicorns? Yeah, mine has not gotten anyyyy better. Everything I mentioned in my experience has not changed. Oh, except for that piece of **** of a car that my dad let me drive is now sitting lifeless in our driveway. I have no car now. Oh and he also said that I won't even get a car if I make a 30 on this damn test which is now in a week. Anyways, enough of me. I'm sorry about what you all have gone through too. I swear, men are pure DOGS. It is completely not fair what we have to go through, they'll neverrr understand. I almost don't even want to get married because its not worth all the heartache. <br />
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I hope everything is working out well with all of you. It's just wonderful to know that it won't be like this forever. Keep in touch :)

So Caitlin, just because my dad doesn't hit me (he has, occasional y ever since I was like 6-7) I shouldn't hate him! Please you've come to the wrong place… We all hate our fathers here!! We want them to die! "Slowly" as somebody said! LOL! I don't think you've ever experienced having major relationship problems with your father like most of us here have.

So Caitlin, just because my dad doesn't hit me (he has, occasional y ever since I was like 6-7) I shouldn't hate him! Please you've come to the wrong place… We all hate our fathers here!! We want them to die! "Slowly" as somebody said! LOL! I don't think you've ever experienced having major relationship problems with your father like most of us here have.

Well if your dad hurts you physically then tell social services about it! if he really is as bad as you say then he could actually kill you! I love my dad, no matter, what has happened! My dad is a police man and shouts alot. He grounds me sometimes if i wear make-up! im 13,its stupid, he doesn't understand what we ( 13 year old girls) go through, with boys and that. I wear it anyways but i dont like hiding stuff from my mum and dad. I love both my parents equally. Even though my dad shouts, I will never HATE him! Don't say you hate your dad, esspecially when there are actually people who get abused. People who get abused dont say they hate their dad, sometimes they love their dad so much they dont tell anyone, so their dad just keeps abusing them and they end up being dead. <br />
If your dad doesn't do anything to physically hurt you, you shouldn't hate him! You are being stupid if you say you hate him! My dad makes my family akward but i still love him!! He wil always be my dad!<br />
Love your dad to. Just tell him what you think! He will appriciate that. <br />
OMG i sound like one of those people who give people advice! lol.<br />
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=) LOVE YOUR DAD!! xx thnx Caitlin

Three words, Caitlin: Not gonna' happen! Maybe you're lucky to have a dad who is good to you, so you don't understand the pain that we all went through. We can say what we want because freedom of speech, right? I honestly thought that USA is a free country...AND NOW YOU WANT TO CONTROL WHAT WE SAY?!? We've all been beaten, abused, neglected, even humiliated...AND YOU ARE APPROVING?!? You, my friend, don't know what you're talking about! If you think the world is full of sunshine and fairies, then you're sadly mistaken because the world is not all fun and games! NEWSFLASH!!! Sometimes family members can be bad people too and sometimes they can do bad things to you, so there's no reason why we shouldn't hate our dads (or can I say "***** donors"?). We have the right to hate whomever we want if they treat us badly. If you don't like this story, then vamoose! Just leave and let us hate our dads!

Sounds like you Dad and my estranged father should be Bffs!

I am getting Pissed of at my ******* Father. He is such an Ahole. He gets anything and everything for my brother just bcoz he thinks he is perfect. I dont get a damn. I have been asking for a car since two years. The b.astard never gets me one. And my brother gets all that he wanted. Now he is giving all **** *** pain to my father coz he betrayed him. Still my f.king dad doesnt realize. B.astard just yesterday he sold out my old car. I hate him .

They aren't men. They're cowards. <br />
Frankly, people like them shake my confidence in the opposite sex. I mean, are they all like that? You can't but believe that.

I do everything for my family, I just arranged for our bedroom to be fitted, kitchen to be fitted and we just went on holiday, what do I get? I get my Dad, who talks to my sister i order to communicate with me. I need to go to the post office, "He'll need to go then". Why can't I be talked to properly after doing so much. And after asking why he said this he just goes insane, starts to say who do you think you are, something so big? Yes, because i'm your son, and just to remind you, you have two children. We probably won't talk for a few months now, i'm going back to university in september, so maybe not until Christmas, I try to love him, I just wish he would do the same. When I was little he used to say really bad things about my mum, ad one time I said it back about his and he hit me and shouted at me. He didn't talk to me for 4 months. When I went to India to meet his dad, he was the cause. He made us all cry when he insulted my mum and shouted at us all. They've brain washed my dad to hate my mum and anyone that comes in his way, and I can't do anything about it.

i noe how that feels! my dad is a jerk! he's a total bastard! i wish sth terrible would happen to him. repercussions! at least! someday somehow his act will be justified! punished upon! for terrible things he did to my mum and my family!! i just wish my mum could divorce him! n we will never ever have to c his hypocritical face again!!

i detest my dad!! upon reading on your blog...i thought that i was the only one who have that kind of father ever!! he's exactly like your dad....i really want him to die..oh no...SLOWLY DIE MISERABLY!!

I know what you mean...my father is the worst father ever, he is always yelling at us (me and my siblings), if we ever dare to defy him he threatens to beat us or sometimes he just does it, no warning, he's been like that my whole life.<br />
he hates spending money on us, if he ever does he gets so mad that, even if you're quite, he'll yell and beat you.<br />
i love my mom but i guess i resent her 'cause she could've stopped this situation, she could have divorced him but she never did, even if i asked her!!!!!<br />
we all know he is cheating on my mom but she says she doesn't care what he does, but that's not fair!!<br />
the worst is that EVERYONE thinks he is the greatest father ever, cause when he is out of the house he is the nicest person you could ever meet, you would think he is incapable of raising his voice at anyone...we are the only ones who know who he really is and i hate not being able to talk to anyone about him!!!!!!<br />
i HATE him so much!!!!!!!<br />
and the worst is that i think my brother is becoming like him, he is yelling all the time, he likes to offend you and if he gets really mad if you don't do what he says, sometimes he can physically hurt you too....and he is extremely sexist...just like my father, this makes me hate him even more, he did this to my brother!!!!!!

I hate my dad too... my dad is a dumbass he can't do anything by himself except for hating me and worring about his money..... so he makes me do all the ***** for him and he stil ******* hates me...<br />
i probably should not say this but i want him to die so my life would get better... i don't think i need him at all.... all he care about is money, and me having a perfect job so that he could live rich.<br />
he is such a *****. he embarrass me in front of people. he trys to put me down and then he tells me to do something for him. i really wish he dies. then i will be happy and i could have nice small family with no conflicts. im sad that so many people goes through same thing as me. and when i grow up i will not be like him. because his a ******* ***** who just want a money. and i don't want to be like that person.