I Don't Like My Daughter In Law

I am a mother of 3, two boys and a girl. My 19 year old son girlfriend is well was pregnant. She move to Ok to live with us her parents live in Ohio, we never were introduced to her parents, she told them she was coming out here and they said whatever. she has lived here with us for a year on and off her parents talked to her on and off once every 3-4 months. Well she got pregnant. She was afraid to tell her parents, but she did and they hung up on her and didn't talk to her for 3 months, Her and her mother have had issues they would get into fist fights and she put her daughter in juvie for 3 months, she moved out not long after that she lived with her exboyfriend.  Well about 3weeks ago her parents asked her to move back.
We built my son and her an apartment on our property, My son was in college, my husband teaches at a college so our kids go for free, my son was doing well and wanted to be an archeteck. He worked at night for school district (janitor) and school 3 days a weeks, insurance and all.
Well her parents talked her into coming home to have baby and she told my son if he didn't come he wouldn't see the baby, her father said he could work for him, and they could live in their basement, For Free. Yes they paid rent here with us, one hundred and fifty dollars a month, we were trying to teach them resposibility, that included utilities and food and my sons phone bill. So one morning i got up 3 weeks before baby was due ( first grandchild) and they packed up and left. I tried to tell him he could be a good father but he needed to finish school he said her dad said he didn't need school he will always have a job with him lol. No talking to him, he wasn't going to let her leave and not be in kids life. Well since then havn't really had much conversation with him, but try not to say anything neg. cause i would like to be able to see my grandchild, but i don't know if she will allow that, she is very controlling tells him when he can eat, play games with brother or sisters go swimming talk on phone,how he can spend money have never said anything to her but told my son i don't like how she treats him.  I got pictures of my grandchild off facebook he did send one when he finally said i didn't answer when she sent me one when he was born, i told him i didn't get one he said she said she sent one. Well i think she just told him she did and really didn't
i hope he relizes and sees how she is before it is to late. I can't stand her because she has destroyed his life we did everything for them took them with us and paid for almost everything, she didn't appreciate anything and the final blow was she took the birth of my grandchild away from me, and moved 800 miles away and i wasn't able to see my grandchild be born. We were looking so forward to it. I asked my son what is he going to do when her and her mother start fighting again. What if the baby gets hurt. I told him he needs to think about these things and have a plan just incase. He parents are controlling, they bought thm a car but told them if they didn't move back they were going to come get it . ( still in their name) and because her younger sister wanted to move closer to her job they took her car away that they bought her when she was 16 and wouldn't let her have any of her stuff in their house cloths or anything.

Thanks for listening just needed to vent
tlBoggs tlBoggs
41-45, F
2 Responses Jan 4, 2011

I know how very frustrating it is to have someone hold a grandchild over your head. Its a horrible helpless feeling. <br />
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You're smart not to burn bridges with them though. Her parents will get tired of the situation eventually (they did before) and she and your son will be back. Its just how people like that are. Its really hard not to hold grudges....I'm struggling with similar issues too so I know first hand!! But for the sake of your own sanity you have to let the past go....don't hold onto the fact that she cheated you out of being with your newborn grandchild. Its just going to eat at you and make you sick.

sounds like they need to get away from the controle FREEEAAAKs...