Can't Be the Type of Friend...

I hate my ex best friend for telling me she couldn't be the type of friend I wanted.( A friend with compassion, understanding, forgiveness, and love?)

I have been hospitalized over 10 times in the last 7 years. I am Bi-polar. My ex best friend never once visited me while I had an episode. We had been through a lot in the past. We did a lot of partying and such. I was there when she cheated on her boyfriend and later broke up with the same guy. I visited her when she was lonely in another state. I comforted her in her times of sadness and needing of a shoulder to cry on. Then one day I took her to lunch and confronted her of my saddened feelings on why she never visited me in my times of need. I always knew she was selfish, self conceited, and self absorbed. But I never knew how inconsiderate and unfeeling she truly was. It was during this luncheon she told me that she felt I was looking for attention from her and others, and that's why I tried suicide attempts over and over again. And that She had no time for this and no energy to put into it because she was just getting into a relationship. Her exact words were..."I feel that you are only trying to gain attention again like you got attention back in high school. I have no time and energy for that. I cannot be the type of friend you want me to be!"

Was I really asking for too much in a friendship? A little compassion? A little understanding? A little patience? Or even a little bit of love? Now, I ask, was she really ever a friend this ex friend of mine?


o0cherriepie0o o0cherriepie0o
31-35, F
2 Responses Aug 8, 2007

I had a similar situation with one of my friends, he only showed up when he needed something, like a loan or a lift. I confronted him about this and have not been used since. He's moved onto to someone else. I could never hate a person for being like this and have come to realise that we are all different and possess different morals and values in life. The best friend you will ever have is yourself, but first you must learn to control your own mind and give without expecting any thing in return. Get over it! Good luck!

If she is your friend or ever was, she should accept you for who you are. She should have been there for you when you were in the hospital. Made an attempt to understand bipolar disorder and validated your feelings instead of making excuses for her bad behavior and insensitivity. You are better off without her.