I Thought It Would Be Nice To Set The Table.

I used to love my family growing up. I never had the greatest friends as a young child, well I don't have the greatest friends now, but there are some gems that I'm close to. I loved them, I would have done anything for them. I had a very happy childhood. Then my senior year of high school it all changed. My dad hit my sister when she would go on her out of control tantrums (She was 17 at the time). He hit my mom once and that was kind of the tipping point for me. Of course my mom, dad, and younger sister they'd always have these awful fights but they never once cared to ask if I was okay? Or stop to think if any of this could possibly be affecting me? My mom was so worried about it affecting my younger sister, but not me. I went to therapy that year, it helped a bit.

Then finally I was free, I went to College. That first year I grew a lot, I finally realized what an incredible person I was, as my mom wasn't hanging over my shoulder and criticizing me. Second semester I even met the wonderful guy who is now my boyfriend of 2 years and few months. But that just sounds too perfect, why should my life be going so well away from them? Then they decided to move near me, and silly me, I was actually happy. Well the summer they moved here was the worst summer of my life. My mom and sister wouldn't stop bitching to me about how terrible my boyfriend was (he's great by the way) My mom doesn't like that he's not in college and my sister was just being a *****. Quite a few times they made me cry so hard I started gagging, only then did they stop to think how their words were hurting me. That's just the tip of the iceberg. But still I tried to be nice to them, I lived in the dorm during the year so it was slightly tolerable in the summer.

So now I'm about to start my last year of school, which I'm paying for myself (they were paying for my college so I guess I felt I owed it to them to be nice). I'm doing a Vet undergrad degree, with tough science classes, so I don't really have the time for a job, which means I'm stuck living at home with them. On the one hand I'm greatful to have a roof over my head, but at the same time I can't stand being around them anymore. I've tried so hard to be nice, but I guess my patience has worn thin. Now anytime something bothers me I can't even keep calm I just snap angrily at them.

Anyway the real point of this story. So I came home from spending the weekend at my boyfriends' and saw my mom was making dinner, so I thought it would be a nice thing to set the table. I had been sick all weekend and was still recovering, so I washed my hands with soap before setting the table. So once I was done I sat at one of the chairs on the deck. Through the open window I heard my sister ask my mom if I had washed my hands before setting the table. My mom said, yes she did I saw her, my sister whined for my mother to just ask me. So my mom came outside and asked me. I calmly replied that I had especially washed them because I was sick. Then my mom goes back inside and tells my sister so, but my sister wouldn't stop bitching. Then somehow I guess my answer wasn't good enough the first time because my mom asked me again. Now I know that being asked a question for a second time is nothing to get angry over, but I just couldn't take it anymore, I tried holding it in as best I could, as I piled food on my plate to take to my room. See my sister is always a ***** to me when I'm sick because she's so worried about getting sick herself. I just was so mad that here I was trying to do a nice thing and they're making a big deal about whether or not I washed my hand because they don't want to get sick.

Contrast this, with my boyfriend giving me hugs and kisses and making me soup and tucking me and cuddling up to me and not caring whether he gets sick or not. I love him so much. He's my new family. I love and trust him. I just don't trust them anymore. I guess to say I hate them might be too strong, but I have no love left for them. I'm pretty done trying.
laurelvictory laurelvictory
18-21, F
Aug 9, 2010