Family Just Does Not Want to Understand

In this world I like to believe that everyone has a dream. Something that they would like to achieve in their life. For me, that is music. No matter what I have dabbled in, music has always been there. I decided to do it full time. My family thinks that I am a joke and that this is a "phase". I flippin HATE that word now. If it was such a feckin phase then why did you keep encouraging me to do it and WHY did you spend all that feckin MONEY on it? 

Now I feel as if they are all trying to keep me from achieving my dream of being a full-time musician. They think that because I am a musician I am a bum and do nothing but bum around all day. Not true since I have a job and gig around town for extra money. I don't have time to lounge. I have moves to make. People with whom I need to network. I have met some of my heroes. Luminaries of music. They just think I'm some flippin groupie. That I will amount to nothing on this path.

I feel that my dream has turned into some negative ambition to show them once and for all and then keep them from sharing in this wonderful journey. 

Is it that they do not understand someone who is creative? Who is artistic? Because I am the only musician in the family apparently I have this stigma. They fear for my safety which I understand. But for once I would like them to be happy for me. They seem very jealous. I cannot have that. 

 

I need some outside perspective. Someone who has been through or is going through this. I want to scream constantly. Cry myself to sleep. And completely disown my family. I so desperately want them to be a part of this because they are my family and like it or not I think I love them. I would hate to hate them. 

But right now I can't take it anymore. I feel as if they will do anything now to sabotage my life. 

 

:-(     :'-(

morrisseygirl morrisseygirl
22-25
1 Response Feb 16, 2009

wow i share your pian...music is my life actually and my aunt was a singer too...but they just critisize me even my aunt!.i wanna major in it but all i hear are negative thoughts about it.MUSIC IS A HOBBY .**** my life its not a fuking hobby!listen..all i can tell you is that watever they sayy just let it day cuz im sure one day they are gona wake up too c this ******* phase aint gona end.hahaha they'll get over it..who cares as long as ur happy and one day ur gona proove them wrong :)