I Hate My Husband Soooo Much

I can't even look at his face without getting disgusted . I swear that he is starting to look like a fat ape. we had an arranged marriage . now it has been 14 years and had 2 kids (girls 12 and 8). i have been physically and verbally abused, cheated on several times. I hate myself now for being with him. Every chance i got and wanted to get away he will beg and give empty promises and make me stay. Now i feel so trapped . My kids are confused and i don't want to put them through all this. I am just holding it all in. I asked him to take me to the club he loved soo much. To my horror it was a ***** club and he got the naked girls to rub their stuff on his face infront of me...What a life. no church , not watching what he is eating and weighs 340 pound blubber for 5.4". I hate my husband even more .But feeling a lot better after i wrote this..
shiny11 shiny11
31-35
1 Response Sep 23, 2012

Dear Shiny11,

It's not your fault that you were young and naive enough to believe that an arranged marriage would work. It's also not your husband's fault, except for the fact that it doesn't appear that he believes in finding love with his spouse in a traditional way. It sounds like he is really immature in that he is still confusing sex with love and it could be argued that taking you to a ***** club is very abusive, especially if you did not know what you were going to be subjected to in the behavior of the entertainment. Very unthoughtful and disrespectful on your husband's part, Unfortunately, with my experience, men when they are immature, are more interested in sex than love. If you don't think that you can continue with his uncaring personality for your children's sake, until your husband matures to a loving nature, then I believe that you should move on with your life and file for a divorce I don't want to see you hating yourself anymore. But first, if you think that it would help, try seeing a marriage counselor. Good luck and God Bless!