Miserable

i hate my husband for being such a lousy provider and father. i hate that i'm the one that has to work to support my 3 kids AND him. he has not worked at all in at least 5 years. and in the 18 years we've been together, the work was off and on, never constant. the kids pretty much hate him too.  hate that he does not take any interest in the kids. hate that he says mean things to them. the older ones just stay out of his way now. the other day he had the cheek to wonder aloud how come the kids avoid him when i'm not at home. he's disrespectful to my parents, downright hostile to my siblings. i cant stand having to touch him. usually i need alcohol in order to have sex with him. every time i bring up the subject of him looking for a job, he'll start in on me and my faults. he used to slap me around and still threatens to sometimes. my eldest boy who's 15 now, recently got into a physical fight with him. i hated my husband most for that. i wish i could just tell him to get off his *** and get out of my house. but i'm just too much of a coward. i've never even said to his face how much i hate him. i just keep quiet and more than hate him, i hate myself because of that.

suz2009 suz2009
36-40
1 Response Feb 15, 2009

You are already doing everything by yourself. You don't need him. The extra money spent on feeding/clothing that SOB will be better spent on your kids. YOU CAN DO IT!!! Being alone is better than being miserable. I have faith in you!!!