Boss' New Wife Is A Micromanager

I work in a creative field and have been in this particular job for almost ten years. When I was hired, I had four assistants, the pace was fast, I could delegate and get things done. Enter the economy - one by one, my assistants were phased out and I was expected to take up the slack.
Fair enough, but I am only one person. And doing the necessary background work was taking away time from the showpieces, what I was initially hired to do - and what my name is associated with.
My boss has always trusted my judgment - he hardly ever asks for anything or gives direction - and when he did, I always reacted to take care of his special request right away.
And now this wealthy man is married to Wife #3, a woman who left her job the day they were married and who thinks the creative parts of my job are SO FUN! She has begun leaving me notes, directing me to caper around like her personal servant, taking credit for anything positive, and changing my work to suit her. She hounds me and condescends to me - she disparages me and my work in front of other departments.
I have never worked for or with someone like this. In ten years, I have gone from VP level responsibility to someone who has to ASK for a lunch break? I am sad and upset every day and have been trying for a year now to keep it all inside - but I am a worse mother and wife now because it leaks out at home. I am sick quite often at work or just before. Sunday nights? Forget about talking to me.
It would be easy to say to just leave - but my pay is still at the level it was when I was in charge of a functioning department, and my hours are such that I can pick my children up from school. These things feel like golden handcuffs. In addition, most jobs at my level are nearly 100% travel - and with small children at home, I just cannot see my way clear to even pursue the few of those opportunities that have come my way.
The boss just wants a peaceful home life. I think this wife is a harridan at home, and I would never win in a contest with a wife.
What might I do to just turn this into comedy, just for my own self-preservation? I am so embarrassed when colleagues in my field are in the building, ones that see my current degraded state of being. What can I do to save my sanity?

aislina aislina
41-45
2 Responses Nov 26, 2012

I'm in the same position and it's the worst feeling in the world. I've tried talking to my boss and finding a resolution but it doesn't seem to have worked out. I'm actually considering working from home. Hope things work please update on how it went.

The very first thing would be to address the problem. Get with your boss and define what HE wants from u and what u want. Try to resolve the problem so u feel happier. B honest with him about his wife in a non confrontational way stating the facts. If u have been there for a number if years hopefully he is aware of your contribution. If it can't be resolved look for other employment. Nothing is worth your self esteem and happiness. It is already affecting your home life don't let it affect your health as well. Good Luck:)