Nosy, Clueless Landlady Who Breaks Into My Room And Gropes Me

About two months ago, I rented a bedroom from a woman who's leased a three-bedroom apartment. Let me start by saying that I'm sure my landlady is a perfectly decent human being who means well. That said...

She is driving me nuts. My laundry list of complaints about her:

1) Possibly one of the nosiest people I have ever met. If I'm not home for a couple of nights, she'll ask me as soon as I open the door: "You didn't come home last night. Where were you?!" If I stay home for a few hours, she'll complain: "You're always here. What are you even doing up there all day?" Uh, none of your business, because I pay rent? (I'm not the kind of person who will tell somebody to mind their own business; I'd rather complain about these people online.) I moved to get away from nosy family members, and I have to put up with this s#!@?

2) I know she went into my room when I wasn't there. One night I came home, and I noticed that a light that I never leave on was lit. I know she's entered my room without my permission on more than one occasion because she asked me about something in my room that's not visible from the outside, even if I leave the door open (which I never do; I always lock it before I leave).

3) Way too touchy. One night she asked me to help her with her new computer, so I went into her study to see what was the problem.  I was wearing shorts that night because it was around bedtime, and while I was sitting at her computer and typing on the keyboard, she went "Aren't you cold?" and grabbed my knee. I flinched and moved away, and she tried again. At that point, I pushed her hand away. Surprisingly, she didn't freak out, but then she started feeling my arm instead to see whether I was cold.  It was creeping me out.

4) She is strangely obsessed with my love life and my family. "Do you have a boyfriend? Why not, what's wrong with you? Have you had boyfriends in the past? Did you break up with them, or did they break up with you? Why? Do your sisters have boyfriends? Why not? Is your mom worried that her daughters will never get married?" I am NOT MAKING THIS UP; she has asked me these questions in the past whenever I have to be in the kitchen long enough to make a meal. She will ask me these questions again and again on different occasions. Then there was one time she asked me: "I really like you. Do you like me?" I just laughed nervously and said "of course!" and hightailed it out of there as fast as I could.

5) Can't speak English. I don't mind this, because I actually speak her language, but I've been pretending that I don't understand that much so that I don't have to talk to her as much. What I do mind is that she has me make phone calls for her.  One night she stayed up waiting for me to come home so that I could call the jury duty number for her.

6) She has no idea how to do ANYTHING that involves simple electronics and constantly needs help.  I'd be more understanding of this and I wouldn't mind as much if I hadn't been having all these other issues with her, but these other issues exacerbate my irritation with her constant neediness.

7) In exchange for lowering my rent for two months, she asked me to vacate my room for two weeks -- her niece and her niece's boyfriend were coming over for Christmas vacation, so she was going to give them her bedroom while she slept in mine. I have family in the area I can stay with, so I agreed. I gave her the original keys to give to her niece; she never returned the keys to me. Good thing I had the foresight to make copies.

8) Part of the deal is that I have kitchen access.  But she's always in the kitchen all day making soup!  If I wait for an empty kitchen to make my meals, she'll just come into the kitchen as soon as she hears me and start checking on her soup or washing dishes. It doesn't help that the kitchen is quite small, so we always bump into each other. (And it always seems like she's the one encroaching into my personal space...)

9) She keeps being "grateful" towards me for helping her out around the house.  This is nice of her and all, but I'd rather have an ungrateful landlady who doesn't need help all the time. To show her gratitude, she keeps giving me things that I don't need and pressuring me to drink her soup that doesn't taste good. This thing with the soup is ridiculous -- she'll spend the whole day making a huge pot of soup with pounds and pounds of pork.  Whenever I'm in the kitchen to make a meal for myself, she'll give me a big bowl of the meat she used to boil her soup and tell me to "at least try a little." When I tried to politely suggest that she keep some of it for herself, she told me she was a vegetarian! She said that she only wants to drink the broth, and that I should eat all the meat because if I don't, I'll be wasting the whole thing. WTF! I agree that it's a huge waste, but why is it my responsibility to make sure that you don't waste your mounds of flavorless meat?

The only thing keeping me here is that the rent is cheap -- ESPECIALLY for my area, and I want to keep living in this area because my family, my job, and my school are all here.  And she pays utilities, which is nice.  But I don't know how much longer I can tolerate this madness.  I'm thinking of getting a door lock that doesn't require installation, which would at least keep her out of my room when I'm not there. That only solves one of my many problems with her, but it's better than nothing...
An Ep User An EP User
1 Response Jan 13, 2013

oh my god! the soup issue is absolutely hilarious! what kind of vegetarian drinks pork broth anyway?