Nothing I Do Ever Works Out

I try so hard to do the best I can. I am taking care of my kids, (those at home and those who are on their own), I am going to school so that I can make a decent living and take care of myself and my kids. I was a stay at home mom for almost 20 years when I found myself out on my own. I had a job when I started school, but I was laid off from it a couple years ago and I finally get another, but it's part time. In order to survive I received public assistance (medical and some food benefits) after I was laid off. I wasn't eligible myself because I was a full time student and not working a regular job. I did, and still do, contracting work when I get it but it isn't steady. I finally get this job now but because it isn't at LEAST 20 hours (it is 18 to 20) I was told I still won't be eligible and since I am bringing more in than just child support and my kids might not be eligible now either. It wasn't like they were giving me much as far as food benefits anyway. Less than 100 dollars a month, but every little bit helped. I feel like I am being punished for trying to do the right thing and better my situation. And on top of this my ex went and changed jobs AGAIN. He does this about twice a year and when he does, child support does not come in regularly. That makes it extremely hard to cover everything I have to. In order for me to stay in school, my parents moved in with me and my kids. As much as that helps, it adds even more stress because I have different a parenting style than they did and my kids aren't used to certain things they do. I am always playing peacemaker and I hate it. Every time I turn around there is something going on. One of my kids didn't do this. Grandma did that. I just feel it all piling on again and I don't know how much more I can take.
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2 Responses Oct 28, 2011

Just stay strong. Things will work out in the end :D

I had figured that you, as a single woman, with kids, did not have an easy time of it. I know that you are doing your best to juggle the many things that you have in your life right now. I know how difficult it must be to come home each day from school, and work to find friction between your children and your parents to deal with, when you have so many things to do. I don't know if a "family meeting" would help, but as you are the glue that keeps things together, a solution must be reached as the current situation is unlivable, and will only get worse if it continues. The first thing though, you need a night or a day off, just for yourself, and to clear your mind. Otherwise, you will not be able to think clearly. The kids, and your parents must understand your situation and that their help is needed in order for you to do what you have to. Some times it just takes a calm reminder to all of them. My heart aches for you dear and let me know if I can be of any help.