I Hate My Horrible Poor Life.

My family is allways broke. We barely have any food in our fridge. Sometimes me and my siblings have no choice but to go to the store and steal food.
The only time when we have lots of food in our fridge is usualy around the 1st of the month because thats when my mom gets her food stamps.
I allways get abused and yelled at by my mom, older brotherĀ  and older sister. My sister beats me and my younger siblings almost everyday. We are forced to clean the house. She allways pulls my hair and punches me if I don't do something right. She allways yells at me and calls me names and tries to make me feel ashamed of myself. She can never let me be myself. I'm tired of her criticizing me. She makes me want to kill myself! I was gonna swallow bleach one time because her and my brother were hiting me and made me cry. My family has been homeless several times. My mom can't pay the rent sometimes then we loose our home. We slept in cold cars, walked the streets at 12 am , slept in resturaunts and anything we could do to avoid sleeping outside. Everyday is the same thing, clean the whole house, get yelled at, get hurt, and feel depressed. Sometimes I wish I was dead. What's the point of living if this is how i'm going to be treated? People think I'm a happy person because I smile in almost all of my picures. But no one could truly understand how I feel. I hope when I turn 18 I will move out, go to college ( if i can pay) and live my own life. I pray for God to help me but he can't do everything. Sometimes you have to solve your own problems. Each day I wake up and think about how life used to be great and how i used to live it. Now I just hate my life. Hopefully things will get better. Thanks for reading and God bless (:
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4 Responses Dec 31, 2010

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I came across your page. I hope everything is well with you. Stay strong try and find a happy place. Have you tried talking to your family about how you feel? I'm sorry you are living like this no one should put their hands on you make you feel the way you do. God bless

I am truly sorry that you have to go through this, and I know how tough things can be when there isn't enough money. I assume that you posted this picture into your life in the hopes of finding help or a connection, and while I would love to help I am only in a position to listen and give you advice. I went through the same **** the past four years all of my high school life I was always unsure of whether or not I was going to come home to food or running water for that matter, but like everyone who has been through tough times and survived will tell you, it made me stronger. I may not have been able to be kid and enjoy my childhood, but from having to become self sufficient I grew into the strongest willed, minded, and determined person I know. The onyl thing I can say to you is to just hold out and do your damnest to work hard in school because it will pay off come college, and ba<x>sed on your desc<x>ription as long as you fill out all the necessary forms like the fafsa and colege applications on time you will probably have a full tuition paid for as long as you have the grades to get into college, and once you get to that point you are free. It's tough right now, but you juts have to keep working day by day until you get to the point where you can escape this situation and find your own happiness and once you get on your feet you can go back and help your family, because trust me family is the only thing you have in this world thats worth saving, so buck up and keep on keeping on and know that one day you will be done with all this what seems unfair and pointless **** and living a happy worry free life

I'm sorry sweetheart you are having such a rough childhood. I also had a really bad childhood and I know it probably won't help you now but it made me into the person I am today. I think you family hits and screams at you because they are all under stress (not to say that is ok). I agree sometimes you have to solve your own problems but then there are the other problems were your going to need help. Have you spoke to a teacher or someone at school to see if they can help you?