Not Even My Mother-in-law Yet...

Alright I need to vent and I found all of these horror stories about mother in laws and feel the need to share and get opinions from all of you in the same boat..

I have been dating my boyfriend for 4.5 years and things were going wonderful.  I met his parents when we first started dating and they were so nice and I actually enjoyed their company, and looked forward to going to visit... well that was the beginning... as time went on things started changing..  when he would come to visit me and we would be out doing something or other his mother would call a billion times, and the one time when he didn't pick up his phone she left a voicemail saying, "If your pants were where they are suppose to be you would be able to answer your phone.." always insinuating that when we would visit each other it was strictly to have sex.  As time went on she said other lovely comments about how she was glad that she had two boys because all girls are ****** and things of that nature.. FYI she dated her now husband in high school, got pregnant and he felt that the right thing to do was to marry her.. so she got pregnant just so he would marry her.. great woman..

So now that I had graduated college she felt the need to meet my parents.. she invited herself and his family to my house on the weekend that she chose and would not allow my boyfriend to drive separately because he would be staying with my family and I.  He of course rode up with them to their hotel and I picked him up and they all had to come outside because they said they were coming to my house that night also.. umm no.. my Mom had planned for them to come Saturday afternoon.. they also expected me to plan what they were to do the next morning until it was time to come to my house, and also that I would have to drive to their hotel to lead them to my house, instead of following directions.  These people are not independent at all in new situations.  So fast forward to Saturday and she brought these god awful beans for the little picnic.. she picked through all my Mom's food and made faces and kept making a big deal saying, "Where are my beans, I want my beans.."  They overstayed their welcome and would not leave.. my boyfriend and I go to church when he visits so we planned on leaving, even though they were still there, assuming they would get the hint also, no way.. we got back from church and they were still there...  They were suppose to pick him up Sunday afternoon and came at 9am saying it was time for them to get home...

He had one more year of college left and I would go and visit and watch him wrestle in his matches.. well they insisted that if I was coming to visit we HAD TO stay at their house for the whole weekend and visit with him.. we were not "allowed" to stay up at college and visit with our college friends.  That was the first time that I really had to put my foot down.. they could tell him what to do all that they wanted to but they sure as heck were not telling me what I was and was not going to do when I came to visit.  That started the drama because I said no, so he just decided he would not tell them when I was coming into town instead of facing them.

His graduation was this past May and that was another lovely family experience.  I came in Thursday so that we would have Friday to go hiking and anything fun before his graduation Saturday.. his parents told him that we had to drive from college to their house so that we could get pictures and ride to college together as a family for his graduation.. I was okay with the picture part if I had to be.. but of course when we got to the house there were no pictures.. I was stuck in the back of a van with no windows open and no air for an hour.. we got there 3 hours before graduation and had to sit with them while his Mom sat behind me kicking my chair and making fun of what people were wearing because she insisted she should have worn jeans (classy lady that she is) After graduation it came time for going out to eat and celebrate.. my boyfriend picked the restaurant and we went and there was a 45 minute wait.. nope wasn't happening.. his parents decided we would all go to some ****-hole restaurant to eat... some graduation dinner..

Now to June when we were going on vacation together (just my boyfriend and I).  I drove to his house because it would be a shorter drive from there than my house and boy was that a mistake.  I got in early Saturday afternoon and we had made plans to visit our coach (we had the same coach in college--how we met), and I was only there for about 20 minutes (I planned it that way..haha).. after we visited with our coach, one of my college friends was in town with her boyfriend so we met them for dinner and drinks.  The entire time we were out for drinks my boyfriend kept checking the time and being very uneasy because "his parent were going to be pissed that we weren't home to visit."  When we got back to the house I went upstairs to get ready for bed because we were planning to leave around 6am..didn't his parents make sure they stayed up to visit with us.. I went right to bed.  We got up early Sunday to get everything packed up and no one was awake so I was thrilled that we could get out of there.. doesn't his Mom wake up and kiss all over him about how much she was miss him.. for a freakin week.. and then looks at me and screams "What is your problem with our family" and wakes the whole house up to start drama for an hour and delay our trip of course (everytime we make plans--she changes them.. every single time).. we got out of the house after the drama and the day before we are suppose to come back she calls his phone asking to speak to me.. she wants to have lunch and get things straightened out.. I decided that I could do that for my boyfriend if she was trying.. I call my Mom to tell her the delay in plans and come to find out, his mother called mine because I was "attacking her" in front of everyone because I have a problem with their family.  Needless to say my Mom is not the sort of person who stands for anyone talking about her kids or her husband but  decided to be nice and try to get things fixed for mine and my boyfriend's sake.  Lunch was just what I expected, talking about how much I hurt her because I don't like them and she has never treated my bad and loves me like a daughter and how depressed she was the whole week that we were gone, she couldn't even get out of bed because of how I made her feel, when I didn't say what I would have really liked to... I'm talking to my Mom on the way home and she tells me that her and my future mother in laws conversation was akward because she told my Mom that she knows when my boyfriend and I first had sex because my boyfriend tells her everything (First of all, my Mom and I don't have that type of relationship for discussing our sex lives).. I was appalled... next she sends an e-mail to my Mom ripping me apart as a human being saying that I am a ***** and I only come to see her son so I can have a roll in the hay, and I am snotty and think I am better than her, how my Mom is a horrible mother because she thinks I am "Miss Virginality" according to her and my Mom doesn't really know anything about her kids.. blah blah blah...  I am so mad at this point that I call my boyfriend's house and speak to his mother and told her that after the drama she was created, I want nothing to do with her ever, she will not be a part of the wedding, or the her future grandkids if my boyfriend and I even stay together and hung up.  She attacked my boyfriend after she got the phone call and said that he needs to end this because I can't keep her away from her son and grandkids.. he pretty much told her that after the things that she said and done, I have every right to do whatever it is that I think I have to.. I dont know how this is going to end up or how this is going to work but I am still so upset that he pretty much did nothing except say I can make my own decisions (what about him backing me up)... I know that if we get married I am not marrying his family, but should I really have to put up with this???? What do I do now???? Someone who has been through this please help.. I am at a total loss about what I should do... the things that I mentioned were just the major things.. there wouldn't be enough room to write everything she has done and we aren't even married yet.... PLEASE HELP!

Angelagolfer22 Angelagolfer22
Aug 9, 2010