God I Hate Her..

my mil has thretened to beat my fing face in if she ever sees me again...and for some reson my fiance thinks its ok for her to say that about me it was not said directly tome but thru a text message on his phone which i found. maybe we should pitch in together and get them couples therapy im sure theyd get along real nice. crzy *itches

I can totally relate. My MIL hasn't seen our daughter since she was 2 months old. You are doing the right thing. Keep her away! You don't need to expose your children to that drama. I can honestly say I hate my MIL too. I know they say it takes more energy to hate, but the woman is crazy and deserves no compassion!

Wow thats really harsh. I'm sorry for your situation. I wish there was something I could do to help.



Cheers,

Thomas

http://trashyourneighbors.socialgo.com/

hang in there chic. i dont have a mil like that but i understand ur frustraition. ive always been able to find the positive in anything. n honestly its getting harder n harder to do. this is a tough site to visit . she's missing out on alot. but its her loss. i do believe strongly in karma . so jus try to love her in spite of it all. n keep ur karma good. n remember don frown too much. it causes wrinkles,lol

Wat a phycho B***H.... and y does DSS always listen wen they know shes lied before... now thats dum and your MIL has a massive MENTAL PROBLEM farr out thats way too over board.... and as for your partner has he ever stood up for you.. or is that the same as all partners choose thea mother over their other half wel meant to be thea one tru love... I mean wats the difference wif our Mums... I fought against my whole family for him and he chooses ta keep his mouth shut coz he says "I dont like dramas" thats wat drop nut weak men say ... Im really pissed and so happy that theas many other woman gng thru wat im gng thru but pissed becoz to mujj MILs are just like my MIL i mean this sucks big tyme getting treated like we aint human beings... Im over sitting in the bak seat getting **** nothing while my partner treats him mum like a queen... I wana b a QUEEN for once i understand that they feel threatened and that thea son wil do anything as long as thea precious mother is alive so wat... why did her son stay wif me if they werent man enuf to put thea mother in thea spot.... wel i knw one thng for sure if i have my second baby she aint gna even say a word becoz il put her and her son in the bak seat while i drive .... MY WAY or the HIGHWAY lol i fnk thats hw they say it lol

My husband was adopted by his grandparents while he was 4yrs old. So he has deep yearnning to wanna be perfect, to achieve and to pe something her biological mother is proud. He had built his life to impress her to make her love him. While he was deployed, I went home while I was 7months pregnant.

One Sunday I greeted his birth mother outside of church, I was so excited to introduce myself for the first time, in mid sentence she rudely and loudly told me that she wasn't his mother and not to talk to her and that her mother was the grandmother was the mother who was about a 100 feet from us. In front her friends, in front her teenage son she embarrassed me and to top if all of she her words cut me like a knife. I was very emotional at that time cause I was pregnant and my hormones were irregular. Of course, I already met the grandmother who raised my husband the day before. So I walked away and I told my husband over the phone what had happened. Maybe she was deflecting me because she was protecting her own mother's feelings. But the fact was she shut me out in front of a lot of people even people I don't know. Later on she came over and apologized, the only reason she did this is because she found out that I was going to have a girl. She wanted to adopt her because she only had two boys. The gall of her!!! She tried her best to be nice to me so she can see my daughter after she was born. I guess I shouldnt care if she like me or not. But the one thing that I feel most guilty about is driving my husband away from the relationship he wants to build on the most, his relationship with his birth mother. I told myself that I will not open myself to rejection and ridicule or controlling coniving actions of my in laws especially his mother. And that's what I did for 3years now but I can see that I have been hurting my husband for three years too. But if I saw her right now in my presence I would walk away and pretend I didn't see her at all.

Hello Everyone! Sorry , I do not understand why we keep on saying these crazy MILs are good people.



They just are control freaks, insensitive bullies. I think these behaviors should be included in domestic violence as a form of psico aggression. The passive aggressive way the execute it make it even more dangerous. Because we can end up feeling that it is normal, or is her character, or is something that is not avoidable or even worse, that we somehow deserve it or it is something that we are not doing well.



We should feel more compassion for ourselves, acknowledge that we are entitled to feel how we do and we should not tolerate it (I know, easier said that done) such abuse.



I think all this aggressions comes from envy. These MILs can not tolerate to see other people leading a hapy life. We have to show them that we do not care.



Keep on smiling even more!!!

Wow, Sorry that you are going through this crap. MIL s are such bit***, they hate to let their sons go. I am married to a man that is the only child, and his mother did not care about him when she was in a relationship but soon as she brook up with her boyfriend, than she wants to be up under him all of the time. She told me that she hated it when we got married(this is when I thought that she cared about me) that alone let me see her true feelings, than I lost my job and had to move in with her (a few months 9) we find that I am pregnant the same month we move in and wow. The beginning of the pregnancy she was different, changed drastically and started giving me the evil eye. I had to go on W.I.C. because of the reduced income and she got mad that I used her address just so she can collect her Food stamps that she doesn't need (she has a job and so does her ex that resides there and her mother) she almost sent me into a frenzy cursing at me and telling me that I was disrespectful and not going to amount to anything. She apologized, and I forgave her than recently she really crossed the line. To say the least we will never speak again she doesn't care about her grandchild and she will never see him again. She tries to do voodoo, but she can try if she likes. This lady is possessive when it comes to her child. She wants him to herself, her own mother told me so. she called me names that I never knew existed and is petty and spiteful such a who**. I think that she tried to send someone after me because she is that type of person. These women are crazy and possessive, we need to watch our backs ladies and gentleman.

!!!!!! CAN YOU SAY PSYCO B*TCH!!!!!!!



i AM GLAD YOUR HUSBAND IS LIKE MINE..... Mine has seen the light...... He knows the truth but she has no idea that he knows anything..... lmao...... hopefully you can read what I have been through..... it does get better...... EVENTUALLY..... I am still waiting too..... what I think the problem is in my situation is... IS HEAVEN DOES NOT WANT MY ""MIL"" AND HELL IS AFRAID SHE WILL TAKE OVER... lmao

Man she sounds like a "blast" to have around! Ugh,what a pain in the arse! Hang in there girl. Plz read my experince and tell me wht ya think as I have the X Comparison issue myself.

wow what a b*tch

I feel for you all, my mil is bad but hey these take the biscuit. At what point do you say enough is enough. Im considering leaving my husband just so i can get away from the toxic awful family. i just want a quiet life and although i love my husband, im torn, since i hate them

i just told my MIL off today and god did it feel so good! Don't worry about you're kids. They're too precious to be subjected to that woman anyway. Let her have her fake grandkids. Your children deserve better!

Maybe you should give her the *** whooping she needs. Give her reason to go to court.

You have a very toxic mil and it is important that you protect your marriage and your child. You need to see a therapist or a support group together with your husband. This woman will not change, but you and your husband can. It is in the best interest of your child that you have a happy marriage and this woman's influence is nuetralized.

i could so see my boyfriends mom do the same what is wrong with these woman?? i hate mine to and im not even engaged yet because she keeps trying to put a wedge between mine and me. i hate her and i hate yours for you check out my story "what the ****"

WOW... this is coming late I know the last comment was in2007, BUT ditto on this

''I am somewhat reassured to see that the MIL's out there have been a world-wide problem for a long time...and somewhat petrified''



I thought Mothers- In-Law from hell, were only in this part of the world. Where I come from (Nigeria, West Africa), they have some other diabolical and spiritual ways of frustrating the daughters-in-law, with many of them ending as nut-jobs.



I really cant understand why a mother wont leave her son ( cause that is usually the case, its the mother of the husband) alone! geez. I remember the problems my grandmother put my mother through, those were tough times, I shudder to remember. Thankfully, she self-destructed, when we didnt even expect it. So yes, evil may live long, but not long enough, the end wld still come.



Keep ur heads up ladies. xoxoxo

my mil lived 1000s of miles away and still made my life hell she hates me for takeing her baby boy away. she as tied so hard to break us up it almost worked but i love him too much to let it. we have been together almost 8 years married 4 and have 6 kids. but i know she is not done yet but i ca handle anything she does now.

Your mother-in-law will self-destruct at some pt. That is what I am counting on w/mine. My husband and I estranged ourselves from her for good--still I hold onto pain from her viciousness. My B*@ch! of a MIL erected a free-standing poster of my husband's ex-wife in her home!!!! When we expressed several times our offense she did nothing and turned it on me saying I was "blowing things out of proportion" and "insecure". (My husband's ex-wife is shaped like a man, and at least 8 yrs older than myself) She also gave his obsessive, lonely ex-wife keys to her house so she could come over and torture us whenever we visited. We finally had to get P.O.'s against the crazy ex-wife, and his mother was devasted. My husband has a child by the first wife--8 yrs. old who is used as much as possible to attempt to control him and play on his sympathy. The games they have played over the last few years are mind-boggling! My husband's ex-wife calls his mother "mommie" in front of me--I, in my mind call her the biggest Beatch on earth. I wouldn't spit on her if she were aflame! I hope life long estrangement from her son will drive her batty--she deserves it! That's if she can feel--I am beginning to think she is socio-pathic like the ex-wife, who has been diagnosed as borderline schizo and bi-polar. I find comfort in the fact that if that beast can feel--she will forever be wounded! She made my life a living her for 3 yrs! When my husband and I got married and immediately got restraining orders against his ex-wife, his beast of a mother, called for a "family meeting" via email to discuss the "crisis", She included the ex-wife in the family meeting/email, emailing her with our last name (which she retained of course because she is obsessed and still thinks she is married to him after 7 yrs.) and emailed me under my maiden name in front of the family. Now she is convincing everyone in his family that I am controlling him and isolating him from his family because he has decided to put a stop to this mess for the sake of our marriage and our peace. His ex-wife has begged the mom to "rally" his family together for an "intervention" with her son. Too bad. There is no way we can be reached --and we will probably keep it this way for good! If we don't those vipers will raise their ugly heads again. As evil lives long, she probably will. I recently wrote her to give her a "final" piece of my mind and it wasn't pretty at all. I burned that bridge and that demon MIL can burn in hell.

I am somewhat reassured to see that the MIL's out there have been a world-wide problem for a long time...and somewhat petrified.



I have been with my boyfriend for a year. We live on the lake. His parents live 5+ hours away. My first introduction was a week and a half long visit by mother and father + grandchildren. My boyfriend was working and I was 'host' by myself for 9 long days. Needless to say after countless hours of micromanaging our new relationship I was left with stress and panic attacks.



I have never been exposed to this kind of 'treatment' and after doing some research quickly figured out that there is a lot of advice out there. I don't want to hate my mother in law. she truly is a loving, caring woman and she has done alot for her son including lending him the downpayment for this house which he had before we met. I have noticed that when she comes over she says things like, 'you can do this for me, you owe me a little' to her son. this can include anything from staying for a week to letting her unload countless bits of advice, asking for favours, getting rid of furniture in our house etc. My boyfriend feels that he can't effectively say anything to his mother because she always pulls that, 'you owe me' card out, ever so gently. he has spoken to her about interfering in our lives and micromanaging our household whenever she comes over. the result is swearing and saying, 'i'm tired of everyone ******** on me' and 'i'm just trying to help' and hanging up on him. her behaviour is an ongoing problem in the lives of all of her kids and it has gotten to the point where her daughters never invite her over. although i would like to set boundaries and limit her visits i do not want hurt feelings to surround these arrangements.



just a small list of things she can do include, going through our cupboards and re-packaging anything, 'the way she would do it' including labelling everything in her hand writing. she organizes drop offs with herself and her grandchildren for indefinite amounts of time without asking. she criticizes my cooking and offers advice with, 'that's how i would do it,' tacked on the end. she has basically appointed herself the unofficial landlord, planting things outside where ever she wants etc. she pays the debt owing by going into our cupboard where we have change saved up, rolling it and carting it away- without asking. she advises on EVERYTHING and does not consider for a moment that she is a guest in our household and should consider that the way we do things is fine and does not need her to reinterpret and change things. the part that really gets to me is how she interferes in my life- she will grill me with questions like, 'have you got your this yet, have you got your that yet and offers to drive me places to sort everything out, to spend three days with me to do what i haven't done yet and she just can't understand how it is none of her business. i don't know where she gets the impression that we cannot do it ourselves considering that my boyfriend and i are both very mature adults and have managed thus far. i always end up conceding and then having to call her back and say that we have come up with a better plan.



the fact that she has loaned her son money for this house doesn't matter- it doesn't mean she gets to sign herself up for micromanaging our lives and the feeling that he 'owes' her something really does get to him and i. he feels guilty and doesn't put a stop to her behaviour as much as he should.



how can we curb this without hurting her feelings and still making her feel like a part of our lives. our relationship and the future of our family is the most important thing to us and i want MIL to realize that her son can still love her 100% but his priorities are with me and our life.



i want to put a stop to the week long visits, perhaps we could visit her instead? what happens when she comes over and begins rooting through the cupboards and changing everything around? how can we put across that she is a guest and that under no circumstances am i to find her rooting through our things.



i confess that after she left this week i undid everything she had re-packaged and scrubbed her handwriting off every jar she had marked with her 'scent.' including packing a bag with all the food she frequently brings over that we never eat for the food bank.



i already have budding feelings of annoyance. i don't appreciate her controlling and manipulative attitude. i love love love my boyfriend and our relationship is strong and we are on the same page about this, we just don't know what to do.



in closing, a very wise woman is my boyfriends mother and she is probably doing what her mother did to her; i am both open and willing to take sage advice but....will not tolerate the controlling and the insertion of herself into our lives.



sigh.

My soon to be mother in law is driving me crazy allready!! She's acontroll freak. I really need someone to talk to that is going through the same thing. She wants and feels she has to be in control of everything. I'm four months pregnant when she first found out she got me all natural vitamins because she says the ones the doctor gave me are synthetic and no good for a pregnant mom and baby. Then she reads that fish oils are good for pregnant women to prevent premature birth and if I take them the baby will be really smart. Ummm no I told her thank you for the fish oils and didn't touch them until I asked my doctor first and when I did doctor told me no way not to take them things not while being pregnant due to the mercury levels and iodine levels. I told my soon to be mil and she got offended and still pressed the issue about 6 or 7 more times after I told her no I wasn't taking them because my doctor said no. Then she always asks if I'm going to have a natural birth I want to I really do but this is my first baby and I've neer been in that position before so I'llknow once I get there. She still asks all the time it's so annoying. I'm really nice and quiet and shy around my soon to be in laws and I love my boyfriend very very much but his mother makes it hard she always has something to say.

It's been a long time since she her diaper changing days and she ned to realize that I want to tell her that so bad. Then she goes on and on about vaccinations like I don't know I'm a nurse.....hint hint she acts like she's a doctor it's so annoying.

I don't hate her at all she can be very nice but annoying at times. I just have a feeling things are only going to get worse. New moms out there who are going through the same thing, please comment back and help, I've never been through this before

Enter Story or Joke Here: my mother in law made my life and her daughters lives hell when we 1st got together and she did everything she could to split us up. she used to control her daughters every breath and movement and put serious strain on our relationship. this continued for nearly a whole year and we still have the odd hickup. while my partner was giving birth to our 1st child my mother inlaw kept pushing me out and standing in my way so i could not get near my partner. she is the biggest control freak known to man and she is also a child abuser as i have seen her boot her kids and slap them hard etc. she has 1 desabled son and she lives totaly off his benefits. she is also a gold digger. her husband also has to do as she tells him he isnt allowed to sleep at home instead he sleeps at his other daughters. he isnt allowed anything to eat as when my mother inlaw goes to the take away she just gets 1 meal for herself and leaves all of her children out.



i have been totaly pushed out of my sons life i hate the woman i wouldnt care if she was shot dead infront of my eyes she is a nasty selfish evil woman.

also her father is a pidofile and my mother inlaw takes her 3 year old gran daughter to his house on a regular basis knowing full well that she is at risk.

She needs mental treatment for her madness...what a psychosis...

my heart goes out to you all, i ve had ten years of evil manipulation, that always seems to happen when my husband is out of ear shot, she threatens me puts me down and has assaulted me on two occasions,

Though when my husband is in the room she is a kind caring women.

My mil is a truely evil women who has practically destroyed my marriage and has lied non stop and i have to say, i pray that she will drop dead.

these women cause so much pain they really are the scum of the earth.



I really hope that one day nice daughter in laws like my self get the love and respect we deserve

I hear you. that is really sad but you do what you got to do and at least you husband is on you side with this whole thing good luck and best wishes

My mil asked my kids if their mom beat them and starved them .she actually put her son on the prayer list at church because of his bad health just one prob he's had no illness and he recently had a dot phys and got a perfect bill of health .she actually compared me to susan smith and andrea yates and told relatives she was scared I would hurt them but she never reported me once .My husband and I discussed this situation with relatives including her very own sisters and thank the lord they support my husband and me ,We think she has a narcisstic personality disorder because she matched 9 symptoms out of 10 and they are known to be dangerous .what's sad his father will not help her get help to control this .My children see a doc to cope with this horrible mess and it helps .good luck and god bless

Wow - psycho mother-in-law. I can relate as my x's mother-in-law was the same way. I still feel that she convinced my x to leave me - I found letters after she left me stating so.

Sounds she needs professional help from a psychiatrist - really. Is she doing any drugs or drink a lot?