I Only Met Her Once and That Was Enough!!

MY EX MIL AND FIL

I can now happily say she is now my EX mil, and I only had to meet her once, but truthfully, once was ENOUGH!! She is a complete NUTBAR!! She abandoned her three kids when my husband was 7. She left 3 boys behind, twins; aged 7 and a little boy all of 2 years old. First of all I don' know how a mother can just up and leave her kids, so the very fact that she did that was bad enough, but wait, it gets worse. She KNOWINGLY left them behind with an abusive alcoholic father. My now ex-husband at the age of 7 essentially became both the mother and a father for his brothers. He would step in when his father was hitting them and he would take the beatings for them. Because she up and left them behind, the twins especially lost their childhood. The 2 year old Mark, of course, doesn't even remember her. Rumour has it that she ran off to Montreal, became a hooker and lived on the streets, so she must have left behind an extremely ugly situation to chose the streets over her home and kids, but how bloody SELFISH can a person be? How does anyone leave their young boys to fend for themselves when the only parent left, comes home from work and immediately starts drinking. My ex at the age of 7 was SERIOUSLY responsible for cleaning the house, making the meals (his father wanted dinner on the table as soon as he got home) doing the laundry, making the lunches etc. He had NO life, what he remembers the most was how when his father got past the point of no return regarding his drinking every night, he would have to massage his feet, literally for 1-2 hours EVERY night. How the hell was he suppose to get any school work done or even get the chance to play outside with the neighborhood friends?

On three separate occasions, the Children's Aid Society came by due to people calling in about the boys situation and on all three times, they let these three young boys slip threw the cracks, which at the time my ex was happy about because he felt that obviously he was doing enough of a good job that the three of them still were able to be together, and who REALLY knows what would have been better, we all know a lot of horror stories of children who become wards of the state. At the very least at the time the *known* to the boys was obviously more comfortable then the *unknown*.

So all this crap is going on in there lives and meanwhile their mother is doing whatever the hell she wants in Montreal,not even bothering to call them on their birthdays or at at Christmas. It was like she wiped them clean off her slate, they no longer existed to her and due to there father being a drunk they NEVER really existed to him either, except for my ex who was his personal chef, maid and errand runner.

Their Christmases were HORRIFIC, in my opinion. Their father would give my ex 150.00 and stated that each kid could buy whatever they wanted up to 50.00. Meanwhile he is drinking 50/day on alcohol and cigarettes. In those days parents who smoked. smoked in their homes as information about 2nd hand smoke was minimal. BUT the father DID know that my ex husband had a BAD allergy to cigarette smoke and on many occasions was hospitalized due to his physical reaction to consistently inhaling smoke. His father didn't smoke say 5 cigarettes a night he chain smoked, so the house was always full of a toxic substance that made my ex physically and consistently ill. But once again, as usual, when I write, I diverse. We were talking about their wonderful Christmases.So with a $50.00 allocation my ex at the age of 7 had to take on the responsibility of Christmas for his brothers.So $50.00 per child for gifts and stocking stuffers to be figured out by a 7 year old and then to be bought all by himself alone in a mall that he would have to walk to by himself. Meanwhile *MOMMY DEAREST* is living it up like a completely single women in Montreal. So Brian, my ex, would get the Sears Christmas Wishbook every year, hand it off to his brothers, ask them to circle a few things that they wanted and then he would try to figure it out from there. OH did i say my ex MIL was playing in Montreal, like she NEVER had children, or did that skip my mind (GRRRRRRRRRR). My ex would usually sacrifice his $50.00 so that his brothers could have a better Christmas then they would have had, had he spent his $50.00 on himself. OH DID I MENTION THAT I NOT ONLY HATE MY EX MIL BUT I ALSO HATE ME EX FATHER IN LAW? ok, I just wasn't sure if I was getting my point across (LOL). So that gives you an idea of what ONE of there holidays was like, the others were essentially the same, just involving less money AFTERALL alcohol and cigarettes are TAXED!

So..... time goes by and year after year, birthday after birthday, no calls from the mother and no love from the father.

Luckily they all managed to survive their childhoods, with a few beatings here and there and a few missed meals because money always went first to alcohol and cigarettes.

The twins managed via a miracle, to both get into university with full academic scholarships. The 2 year old Mark, was not as fortunate, he had learning difficulties that no 7 year old would know how to work the system to get him the help that he needed, so he eventually dropped out of school after grade 12, yes, for you younger readers, these were the good ol days when we had grade 13. So Mark went into the trades, Kevin (The other twin is currently working part time on a phd and my ex managed to succeed as a commodities broker. All three married (unfortunately Brian, the parent of the family, and I split up BUT we remain good friends, he bought a house down the street from mine, so that the kids can literally walk back and forth between the 2 houses. He is a person that I am proud of and a wonderful father, which means he truly beat the odds considering the role models he had.

The MOMMY DEAREST mil, made one more appearance in their lifes. EXACTLY one day after their father died, she FINALLY remembered she had kids/or should I say a house she felt she could claim for herself. So she returned BACK into their lifes to see if there was anyway she could try and squeeze the little townhouse out of their hands and into her pockets. NOW what a GREAT mother. After she realized that despite her pathetic behaviour, her sons grew up WITH intelligence, she quickly disappeared as she knew she couldn't con the house out of them.

Oh by the way; not one of the men smoke or drink.

now who can beat that I HATE MY MIL STORY?!?

AlwaysRemembers AlwaysRemembers
41-45, F
5 Responses Apr 8, 2007

My family has the same thing to say about my mil. She's been rude to anyone she's come into contact with.

Wow thats really harsh. I'm sorry for your situation. I wish there was something I could do to help.<br />
<br />
Cheers,<br />
Thomas<br />
http://trashyourneighbors.socialgo.com/

truely....

I TOTALLY agree, HER loss!!

i'm pretty sure you win!