This Never Ends... When Will It?....

The thing is...I was on my Facebook and I was thinking alot about what's happened to me that I didn't/don't deserve and I had a feeling to check my husband's messages and what I found was nothing but pain for me..
See.. since I've been with my husband, his family never liked me and were major two-faced pathological lying people but I kept putting up with it because I couldn't let him go and I love him so much and over the course of 3 years it's been non-stop hell and now that I'm finally away I thought it'd be done and over with, but more s*** happened and things just got worse..
Like back in in the year his sister wanted to visit and i told him it was a bad idea because they hate me and it'll just be so much trouble and hell for me because I knew they all wanted me to go through pain, but he didn't listen and she came to visit for over 2 weeks and in those weeks she's taunted me stressed me out and threatened to kill me, my little 2 year old, and give me a miscarriage and at one point she pushed me against the wall and when I told my husband he got in an arguement with her and she started hitting him and destroyed our house with holes in the wall and broken doors she did out of anger and she basically lied to the cops to make her seem like the victim and almost ruined my husband's career..
Ever since I could remember they have been telling him that I'm no good and I'm gonna ruin his life and since the beginning it's never been me to make him hurt or suffer.. He didn't realize what damage they did to me and how manipulative they can be.. To them I'm they devil who took him away but I never caused anything for them to think that way I gave them all his free time he had to them and i was satisfied with just being in his arms at the end of the day, I never intended or instigated anything for them to hate me they have no reason to hate me because I've done nothing but give their son and brother love and happiness and I put up with their HELL while trying to stay happy and raise my kid. It's emotionally and mentally hard to do anything when they are constantly stabbing your neck about everything..
To my luck, he finally realized exactly what I went through just to keep him in my life, but they won't stop. They have been trying to get his ENTIRE family to hate me. I don't understand what they see because I'm no monster I didn't push him away from his family they did that to themselves by being so cooped up in trying to hurt me and take me away from his life. They still invade in our lives by threats and insults to me and sometimes I feel that he feels bad for keeping them out of our lives because he responds nicely to them when they insult me or keep trying to make him feel guilty..

I don't know how much more I can take...
WitheredFlower WitheredFlower
31-35, F
2 Responses Jul 5, 2012

He can always cut them off, but he should never allow them to abuse or disrespect you.<br />
Sounds like they're jealous. They don't like the fact that he's happy with you. So, they're doing everything they can to destroy that happiness. It's up to him to control his family of origin. He needs to put boundaries in place if he doesn't want to cut them off. They don't ever come to your home unless he's there. And no more staying there. If they want to visit, they can stay at a hotel. Can't afford it? Then it looks like they'll have to postpone the visit until they can. But, he needs to protect his family, which is you and the children. His parents and sister are now his extended family. gl

You're right it doesn't end. Focus on what you can control not on what you can't. Your family, your husband , your life, all of that you can control. Let him deal with his family in whatever way he needs to for now. It will all eventually come to a head because he will tire of his family always putting him in the middle. I always suggest two books to read; Toxic In-Laws and The Emotional !ncest Syndrome. These books will help you to understand the dynamics of what's going on with his family and why they are treating you so horribly. It's not you. Also, sometimes therapy helps esp with the husbands, so they can deal with these lack of boundaries and how to stand up for you and your family.