I Will Never Understand People's Thinking....

I grew up with a physically and emotionally abusive mother . And now somehow I have found a good man with a mother exactly like mine! Difference is I walked away from MY mother for good two years ago and I can't just walk away from her. My fiancé and I have a son and another baby on the way along with my older two from previous relationships who consider him dad (their dads are out of the picture completely). I met my fiancé online almost 3 years ago. I lived in Florida and he lived in California. I ended up moving across country to be with him. We had agreed to stay with his parents temporarily to save a good amount of money before moving on our own. Now I don't know what the hell I was thinking! I'm very easy going and a people pleaser for sure. I figured it would be fine. From day one I made sure I cleaned everything and anything. Now matter what though his mom always had something to say to me or him. I didn't do it fast enough or I didn't do it right. Then when she had nothing else to complain about she turned to our room. Our room was suffering because I was so busy trying to keep up with the common rooms so I didn't have to hear her constant nagging! I moved here in July and by November the owner of our rental was putting the house up for sale. So my fiancé took on ALL the bills so his parents could fix their credit and save a down payment. He paid everything until February. Then they found out they couldn't get the house and spent all the money they saved on themselves (minus a crib for our son and that was only because they didnt like the "cheap" crib we were going to buy). March my fiancé got into a bad accident (he's a truck driver). He was out of work for 10 weeks. As soon as he returned to work his parents made him pay back everything they paid while he was out of work. So since then we have been 100% responsible for the house bills and the groceries. Mind you they never have us a dime of what he paid for four months! His dad had to have surgery March this year so I went to work and his mother was babysitting our kids. So I took over the house bills while my fiancé paid the rent and groceries and whatever needs to be covered. Anyway enough about money. They are obviously money hungry ********. Up until his dad had to have surgery I was his mothers personal chauffeur. She can't drive because she injured her back at work a few years back. I would get up at 5:30am to give her a ride and return to pick her up between 12-3. Which is a normal naptime for a baby or young child (between that time not necessarily the whole time). I still dealt with it to help her out. After picking her up I would take her wherever she needed to go. To the store, one or more of the four banks she uses, drs appointments, friends houses, whatever you name it. Majority of the time I had to sit and wait because I don't know my way around that well. That's just an example of what I did for her on a daily basis on top of keeping her house spotless. Which is another thing. She never factored in how long I was busy running her around town. If something wasn't done it must mean I was lazy and she let me know it. Me and my fiancé have been at their beck and call the entire time we've lived here. They keep is stuck here by demanding money that my fiancé will just give them to avoid conflict. If we disagree with anything or don't want to do something (because we have plans) they scream at us and tell us we never do anything for them and we're lazy and that we live in THEIR house so we need to respect them. All this time I have given them respect that they didn't deserve. I finally quit a few months ago because my fiancé was slipping into old habits and was drinking with his friends for the third time in a week at 4am so I was mad. The baby woke up and his mom came to tell me. I figured I could get him inside by having her tell him to get him (they ran out of alcohol at 1:30 and I didn't really want him to take him). It was the second time is a year that my fiancé would have to take care of our son at night and he was already awake. She then said some mother you are among other things. So I just replied back with and some father he is (because obviously with her logic he must be horrible). She started screaming at me telling me not to talk to her that way. What I'm not allowed to defend myself in anyway? It's not like I attacked her parenting like she did mine. That was what pushed me over. The woman has no boundaries. She interferes with my parenting so much that it's like she's the parent not me. My kids were well behaved (for a 22 month old and a 3 year old) when we moved here and were in bed at 7;30 every night. Now they don't listen to a word I say and I'm lucky if they are asleep by midnight. I know I can change that but we have to get away from them first. We are moving in about 11 days. That's still 11 days too long to me. Our last fight started because she still tries to tell me what to do and I refuse to do it. I'm 27 years old and been on my own since I was 17, I do things on my own and she needs to respect me as an adult and human being and stop trying to control my every move. When I simply said I already do when telling me something she just said no you don't you're lazy. I said you don't always do things yourself and she goes it's MY house. I said its my house too (been here 2 years and we pay more bills than they do not to mention when the house got a new owner we paid half the deposit to stay here. She gave that HER house right.). She said no its not. I said yea whether you like it or not it is. She said you don't pay rent. I said my fiancé does. She said so that's MY son. And I said that's my fiancé taking care of his family. She says that doesn't matter. It didn't occur to me t the moment, but after I was like it doesn't matter who's house it is we're both adults and I deserve the same respect I had given them. Technically the way she treats us both is considered emotional abuse. I told my fiancé that. he just tries to lay low and not set her off. That's not a way a person should have to live. No wonder all he did was drink before I moved here (didn't know that ahead of time otherwise I would have been like pass because I grew up with alcoholics). I'm glad I didn't know though because he really is a good man. I think that once we get out he will stick up for me and himself. It's easier to hang up the phone. There's no escaping her in the same house. That's just the tip of the iceberg. Sorry it's all over the place. I'm trying to do this quickly while I deal with my children at the same time.