I Don't Hate My Mother In Law I Hate How She Over Pampered My Husband

I am a working mother who had a different religion with my husband. During our first year of marriage, I had a lot of disappointment to my husband. First big disappointment is he never commits on our agreement may it be simple or complicated nothing have ever come to his sense of responsibility. First agreement he broke, before we got married we have this agreement that we'll study each religion and have a conclusion afterwards of what will be good for our family. Instead of doing it, he consulted his mother and complains of how hard it is having a wife with different religion he even resists to attend some session of our worship while I am very attetive on listening to their gospels. I felt cheated during those time. It's as if here I am committed on our agreement and there he is giving up on our first round. Second big disappointment, I am the one who earns and he stays at home with my mother in law. Before we transfer to their house we had an agreement that he will be the one to take care of our baby boy because I can't afford a salary of a nanny. Then one night after work, my mother in law and my husband told me to hire a nanny because his son which is my husband can't do a nanny work. I was shocked and torned again because it's as if the two of them was working against me. My salary was not that big because I am already the one who shoulders all of expenses of our son and then they wanted to add another bill from my end. I told them I can't afford to have a nanny and as far as I can remember that my husband will take care of my son. I was even named as 'Makwenta'. It torned my heart because my husband haven't consulted me first before exposing me with my mother in law.  And I believe that this is a conversation wherein husband and wife were the only party. Guess what happened that night, because I got mad and suprised on what they did to me I talked to him and told him regarding my point of view.  Our conversation ended on a fight and he even told me that he'll going to leave me.  Then from that time, he and his mother always have a conversation about me on how they hate my attitude, both of them sharing their negative views about me. 
ruchelmendoza ruchelmendoza
1 Response Sep 13, 2012

Ruchelmendoza, so you're expected to hire a nanny so your non working husband can do what ? <br />
Any issue regarding religion should be settled before marriage. <br />
One of the reasons I hate my MIL is becasue she spoiled, coddled and indulged her children. not out of love. but because it is a form of control. By keeping her children dependant on her she can try and control their friends, where they live , how the grandchildren are raised right down to having access to their bank accounts. In fact after we married she refused to take her name off his long standing checking account. So since I was on it , simply emtied it out and my husband and i started our own without her on it. Not a darn thing she could do. Her response was what if there was an emergency and she needed to get money for us...if only she could hear what she sounds like. <br />
I'm sorry for your situation. Sounds like you have a job and some independence.