My Soon To Be Monster In Law

well i started dating the man of my dreams a year ago . we have known eachother for almost 10 years . we moved into a beautiful huge house about 6 months ago with his mother because she said she could help pay 500 or 600 since it was more then we could safely afford, she said it was no problem because she needed a place to stay and it had its own mother in law apartment downstaires. well she had just got out of a relationship with her boyfriend of 12 years , she is a addict in recovery but i dont know what recovery means if they only get worse. well i am a mmj user i have been diagnosed with fibromyalgia it has been very tough on me being a mom of a toddler and a soon to be wife of a merchant marine. with his mom here i thought it would be nice. quite contrary . she begin calling me a addict because i smoke. i just let it go . well she started fights with all her children and their spouses besides me and my guy. well i was her confidant. i tried to make her feel better and was on her side. . until i saw how she was changing she was so fake and nice when my boyfriend would be home but when he left she would hide and never come hangout. well i almost went into a diabetic coma i had a sugar of 27. and the next day i was still feeling weird. i had asked her to watch me cause i felt like i was blacking out she said no. well she completely stopped coming up here started talking **** to the other roommate in the house. the craziness really kicked in after i had my childs father come by since we were under flood warning and they live in low level. well he was here for 15 minutes with my boyfriends cousin and a friend here in same level and wrote my mm that i was sleeping with the baby daddy. now if you saw babby daddy and my soon to be husband. you would know it clearly not true. well she then let this man who the same day had just got out of jail for posession of heroin she had not asked me if he could stay in our part of house i did not know this man. and she was just inviting people to stay with us without asking . he was to stay two days. well two days came and went a week went by now she was having "recovery" people stay downstaires everynight and 2 or 3 at a time. she then has them showering doing their laundry bringing their kids and dogs to stay too. and tells me i cant bring my childs dad over. ***** this is our house you were invited on top of that she somehow manages to only pay 300 a month no utilities. well things started getting really crazy she has been staying up all night and going to "meetings" all day long. started acting pychoatic like coming upstaires trying to take the tv she let us use until mm got home and started screaming calling me all kinds of names. well i told her friend he had to go . well she went nuts at 5 am in the morning pounding on our door screaming flailing. i just ignored her; . i finally talked to my mm about his mother and he told her the people had to go and she told him if her friends werent here she would kill herself. SHES 50!!! who acts like a child throws tantrums says im unstable cause i cry sometimes yet shes the one threatening to kill herself cause she cant have her disrespectful recovery addicts over. and im not talking **** about people in recovery trying to make their lives better. im talking about the ones who say like they are in recovery yet act like complete TWEEKERS. and try to break their children up in their happy marriages. GET A CLUE WOMAN. you dont control ****. keep it up and you can live with your recovery buddies , cause im about over the pychoatic episodes you have
swannysgirl swannysgirl
2 Responses Nov 29, 2012

wowwwwwwww thats a tough situation to be in

This sounds like a much more intense situation than you described. When you are dealing with a former addict, the scenario is very different. First of all, if your boyfriend can talk this through with you, I think you two should find an alternative roommate - someone indifferent who will pay full utilities and does not have such issues. You can help her find a cheap room to stay in ranging around what she is paying now so that she can't complain that she has no where to go. You can explain that as much as you love her, living together has created a very big issue in your relationship so you'd like to continue to improve your relationship as mother and daughter in law by having your own true spaces. You can tell her that way, she can have her friends over and not be depressed, and you both can do what makes you happy. You can console her from afar and not deal with her awful instability. This is no healthy way to live and it sounds like you are living with her more than your bf - what is the point of this? She doesn't sound like someone that can be talked to so just be careful not to offend your boyfriend, but do discuss with him options on having her move out. Just tell him that you want to have a good relationship with his mother, but you are realizing now that this is not possible while you two share the same roof.

it can be very intense. and i have in the past had anger issues. but knowing this is the man i want to marrys mom i have been very calm about the situation. me and bf have talked and i told him i feel safe. he is very understanding this isnt unfortuantly new to him with his mom flying off her rocker and acting nuts. he has had about all he can take with it. especially since her threatening her life over something so trivial., he is out on a boat 7 months out of the year.. so it sounded like a good idea for her to move in especially since im sick. but it has obviously only made situations worse. thank you for you input and advice :)