My Monster In Law - X

To me, she's no longer my "mother in law" but she's just my hubby's mother [X]

My hubby is an only child and both him and X had been staying together without his dad around. Hubby had been her central of focus.

X is not being kind to me at all, and I'm so glad I have this platform to share my story with other wives who hate their husband's mother.

She done plenty of things that make me lost my respect for her and I totally eliminate her from my life .
We were married for almost a year and I met her 1 year before our marriage. Since the time I met her she had been trying to deceive me with her innocent look and I only realised it after our marriage - which made me regrets for my decision.

Although it's almost a year since my marriage, my predicament is a whole list - enough for me to write a classic novel. However the chapter will end only at the end of our life - either me or her or even my hubby.

I really do not know where to start so I just start by saying what kind of person I think she is. She is a simple , petite woman , eloquent and she appear like an innocent, frail woman . People will thought she's an innocent little lady but behind closed door she's the opposite.

Ok - this is not a fabrication or a slander. She had been staying with us since we moved to our matrimonial house a few month back. I had my way of doing housework and she insisted her way and make a mess of my kitchen. In the beginning, my electrical appliances spoilt at her "midas touch" - so I gave the benefit of doubt it could be due to misused or she do not know how to handle.

Subsequently, I discovered my stuffs are broken or even gone missing. My kitchen cloth gone missing ,my fridge were filled with her "rubbish" that I do not want to put anything in the fridge that my mum brought for me... and she even put the stinky durian inside it. Initially i was angry but come to think of it, the aroma of the durian would 'stick' on her "rubbish" inside it, including her face I just let it go.

The most ridiculous thing is, my thermo flask is damage as well. The cap of the thermo flask were damage and it had a big hole in it which look like it's cut by scissors! Well, the damage is 'progressive'. In the beginning , part of the cap is damaged and she told me it 'melted'. Fine. subsequently, the cap became a 'see through' .I was flabbergasted by her ingenuity so I didn't confront her on it.

Whenever her son is not around, she'll vent out her frustration and shower words of profanity at me. She would curse at me and said I'll have retribution on what I had done - ok I dunno what I had done to 'hurt' her but seems she hurt me more .
Once my hubby went for his training and need to be away for a few days, she became a different person and she kept saying unkind words to me. That day I do not know how to react as I don't want to reply her for fear she would turn back and accused me for being rude to her.
I kept my cool but my heart was pumping with fear and I was trying to be non-chalent till I fall sick that day. The first day it happen , I never came back till my hubby return from his training.

I came to realise she is living at MY house and yet I became a prisoner of my own house.

She's really trying to make my life difficult but I tried not to be bothered by her.
I overcame her profanity towards me, overcame her damaging my stuffs . Afterall, It's no used for me complaining to my hubby that she's rude towards me or spoilt my things as there's no proof to it. She'll have her own side of her story and I'll have mine. My hubby won't take side on this.

I was hoping she can changed as what she done to me are not obvious and I have no proof against her misconduct towards me. Eventually she started to hurt me physically.

The 1st time happened in the kitchen - she was making coffee for her son and I was standing beside her washing my dishes. She walked behind me and spilled coffee on my calf. I felt something burning but I didn't confront her as I gave the benefit of doubt she could have accidentally spilled it and I knew she would feign ignorance.

This doesn't stop her nonsense - the last one is when I was alone with her. I was having my breakfast, trying to build up my confidence when alone with her. She brought her radio out to the dining table and glare at me fiercely with her piercing eye. I looked back at her and smiled. She started her profanity again and started to scold me and curse at me. I ignore her and chatted with my hubby via What's App. She thought I was recording her profanity and demanded that I gave my handphone to her. I refused and walked toward my main door. She started to stop me and grab my hand .I was holding my hot drink and my handphone on both hand. Although I'm trained in martial art, I don't want to hurt her so I tried to avoid her. I spilled my drink on the floor in order not to scald her . [ I could have easily pinned her down to her knee and pour the hot drink on her face ] I was trying to be very nice not to hurt her or scold her.

She became violent and dug her vengeance finger on my arm. The scratch is burning and painful. I wasn't angry with her but the first thing that came to my mind is I finally have proof that she's unhappy with me.

Without touching her , I left the house immediately. She could have been charged with assault under the law but I was too kind to her.

My hubby is shocked but he couldn't punished her for hurting his wife.
My parents took good care of me in ensuring I had a smooth skin without any scar but my hubby's mother gave me my first scar on my skin. My aunts who knew of my predicament cried when they saw me.

I don't hate her but I don't talk to her for fear of getting another monster attack from her( or I'll retaliate the next time). To me, she's no longer a 'mother' but worst than a monster that I defined it as 'X'.
My friend told me even her pet cat or rabbit won't scratched her this way.

A mother won't hurt her children nor other people children.

I'm so sorry but she lost her name as a "mother" in-law already.

lifering lifering
31-35, F
4 Responses Dec 9, 2012

Sounds just like mine.I have stopped calling her motherin law ages back. She is just a pest in our house. Just like you mine lives with us every 6 months and yes she breaks my stuff too! Microwave she has burned dozens of plastic dishes by placing them and running them for many minutes without noticing. burning popcorn is a everyday hobby. then she kept a plastic bag very close to the refrigerator bulb and kept the fridge door open for many hours. Result was the platic bag melted to the bulb cover and my brand new fridge has a hole in the bulb cover. She has broken several cups, plates, spoons. throws away food almost everyday. I have no words to describe how agonizing this behavior is. I have enough stress in my life and dont want this added on. These monsters have led their lives they should just let us live ours! Please god help!

Thanks for your response.
Know, whenver I think or talk about her - my blood will boil and my heartrate will accelerate.
Recently she even meddled with my medicne that I put in the fridge and whatever things i put in the fridge or buy, it'll be missing. She'll claimed she eat it- which I don't believed.

I just hated her to the core. Morally speaking - I should improve my communication with her by getting into her 'good books'. but come one, this is what she had done to me.
And she's the one who even once curse my mother.
HOW CAN I GET INTO GOOD BOOK with someone who cursed my mother, destroy my things and even hurt me? That would require the life of a saint to do that!

Recently she even post negative comments on the photo that hubby and I were tagged in - she doesn't know that people will SEE her comments and her image will be tarnished. But I'm thankful to this technology who is able to let a person reveal his/her true self through her action in FB.
BTW, she's not my facebook friend- I had blocked her but my hubby want me to unblock her so that she can see the album I tagged her son in.

I'm not a saint - for once, I really want to have my own say on what I want and what kind of life I want to leave. Can I ask GOD to grant me this wish for Christmas?

Alternatively Is divorcing my hubby one of the better solution?

OK,LOOK your Mother Inlaw is nuts and controlling.She should NOT have been living with you in the Matromonial home.

On the other hand you were BARELY married for a year.As judge Judy would say....get over it !! and move on.

I've had 33 years of crazy Mother Inlaw and a TON of abuse.

My elder sister who is married also don't go well with her mother in law. But the situation is not reached physical. She didn't discuss it from me. She discuss this issue with my mother. Well, my mother didn't give that much good advice on this issue. :D ( She is my lovely mother, so what? We love each other but speak straight. :D). But I was aware of the problem. So, I discussed with her. I told her to be calm and her mother in law [Y] will change. I think she understood it.
[Y] ( as told by her) is not that bad compare to what you have told about your mother in law. [X]. Mathematically , [X]>[Y]. :D
Jokes apart, I admire your patience. : ) . My sister doesn't have that much patience. You have done absolutely correct thing.
I hope you have wonderful life ahead. :)

Thanks :)