Lord Help Us

Well my Mil isn't quite my in law yet. I have been with my boyfriend for a year now. We live together and he is a marine and the love of my life. His mom was always over the top. She added me on facebook and took over my wall with 10 posts a day. Not exaggerating. I didn't have any issues with that. It was annoying but I could handle it. She loved me. Told me all the time, always tried to push Ryan into proposing bla bla bla. So this Christmas we spent Christmas eve and Christmas day with my family and then drove the 3 hours to go spend the weekend with her and the family. We brought our dogs with us to make her happy too. Day 1 went awesome. We had so much fun! Day 2 I woke up to her annoying voice feeding the dogs 100 treats (she dog sat one while Ryan was gone and he gained 30 lbs and is now grossly obese) we had asked her multiple times not to give them treats but she didn't listen. I was annoyed but still not pissed. So then the dog tries to get on the couch and I pushed him off. We don't allow dogs on the furniture. (one dog is 80lbs the other 90...we wouldn't have couch space if we did) anyways when I pushed him off, she went on to tell me what a terrible mother I am. How I need farm animals not dogs since I don't take care of them. The rude comments continued so we decided to leave that night instead of staying longer. She blames me for leaving and is posting all over her Facebook about what a witch I am and what a bad person Ryan is. She is now taking us to court for the dog saying I abuse him. Ryan is no longer on speaking terms with his family. Told his mom she will never see us, our dogs or our future children. I know that this isn't my fault. But I wish there was some way I could fix this! Ryan never had a good relationship with his family and he stands beside me on this issue. But it still kills me that he is losing his family over this!! Anyone have advice on how to smooth things over? Or on getting into a relationship with a crazy mom?!
Newmarinegf Newmarinegf
22-25, F
4 Responses Jan 5, 2013

All I have to say is THANK GOD HE IS ON YOUR SIDE. Don't let the whole thing eat you up. If she went that berserk over the dog, what would she do over your future children. In a weird way, count your lucky stars she's out of your lives sooner rather than later. When children come along, a real beast comes out of the mil, TRUST ME. I'm in a constant competition with mine over my own kids.

Some people are addicted to (((((( DRAMA ))))) !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.
Early warning signs are the 10 posts a day on Facebook.

I have studied Psychology and worked in the field for 26 years and I think that it is nice that you car about this train wreck of a family but PLEASE DON'T.

When someone feeds you dog to death and you ask them to STOP and they don't it means that this person is trying to control you and they have poor boundries.

The part were she __LOOOOVES YOU SOOO MUCH !! is really anger that is disquised as a gushing love.That's why she went from overly friendly ......to posting what a witch you are and what a bad person her son is.

Your dealing with Mental ILLNESS here and it was here loooong before you arrived at the MIL'S house or entered her life.

You said " Ryan never had a good relationship with his family and he stands beside me on this issue. But it still kills me that he is losing his family over this!! Anyone have advice on how to smooth things over? Or on getting into a relationship with a crazy mom?! "

1) Ryan could lay on a THERAPISTS couch and tell them stories about his childhood that would curl your hair.Ryan appears at this point to still be stable and sane.He is also a REAL MAN that stands by his wife.

2) YOU have a kind and forgiving heart which will help you in your marriage.

3) If you want to get along with your MIL your going to have to take LSD EVERYDAY to understand her psychotic mind.Keep your distance QUIETY and this is what will happen.The MIL will have a NEW CRISIS in a few months and she will call you as if NOTHING ever happend.Listen to her nutty situation and then disappear again like a submarine.This DRAMA QUEEN can't have ____STABLE__ relationships with other people.Ask Ryan if she goes from CRISIS to CRISIS with people ??

Could not have said it better!! She definitely is addicted to drama!! And I knew this before but I figured by being kind and patient it would just keep to her little world. Ryan and I are both paramedics so we see a couple of mentally ill each night and his mom definitely fits the profile. This made me laugh so much! Thanks!!

training your dog is abuse? oh please lol You can't fix it sadly. My FIL physically abuses my dog(I live with my husband and his family due to financial issues) And he'll rile my dog(less than a year old up) and then hit him in the face for getting excited. He also keeps his own dogs caged 24/7 and yells and kicks their cages when they whine and bark to go outside. They keep our dog locked up when we aren't home(we take our dog with us everywhere though) so we bought him a very expensive, and VERY large cage that is cleaned every week and filled with toys.

Yea. Apparently I need to be on America's most wanted because I don't let dogs on the furniture. We actually have to lock them up while we are gone though. Lost 2 couch cushions to them so far! On 2 different couches. Ugh lol but they are loved and spoiled dogs. Just sucks to be looked at negatively and a judged by something like this.

My dog isn't allowed on the furniture either, hes a rotwieller pit bull mix and is VERY heavy. He also sheds. Its not your fault that you actually value your investments.

Have you ever heard the saying " you can't fix stupid"? I would say at this point count your blessings that your boyfriend is supportive of you. Let it go for now and enjoy your life.

Yea. It's just tough knowing he is basically losing his mother because of something do dumb! I guess a real mother wouldnt act like that anyways though.