Just When I Thought It Was Safe...

I hate my mother in law.  Really.  A lot.  Just when I thought things were going smoothly with my husband, she reared her ugly head.  It's not that I'm a hateful person, but she's so damn critical.  Not of me so much, but of my husband.  She nit picks him to the point of insanity.  Also, she is so far from perfect it's ridiculous.  She can't be a part of a stable relationship.  In the past, she's only called when she wants to make my husband feel guilty for something he did several years ago, or she calls to tell us how horrible her life is and wants us to fix it for her.  She's in her early fifties, and lives her life like she's my age.  She only dates much younger men, who are usually alcholics.  When they start to flirt with younger women, she gets jealous.  Because she picks charismatic younger men, they usually don't have a problem telling her off and then leaving her.   When her new boyfriend leaves her or becomes less of a prince than she expected, she calls my husband.  He, of course, defends her actions, and feels sorry for her.  I might be able to feel sorry for her, and listen to her, but she makes the same choices over and over again.   All of this could be overlooked, but now she has decided to come and live very close to us.  She called and told my husband her latest relationship had gone sour, and wanted to live with us.  My husband told her to come be with us before he even talked to me about it.  Even worse still, is that I didn't have much time to scream some sense into him.  She is already on her way.  She has no money to support herself, and has job-hopped for the eight years I have known her.  I told my husband exactly what I thought of his mother, which wasn't nice, and told him she wasn't spending one night in my house.  I work over forty hours a week, and I'm not doing it to support someone who wasn't bright enough to get her act together sometime in the last thirty years.  So of course my husband and I are now fighting.  I don't want to kick him out, but on the other hand, I don't want to just succumb to the horrible mother in law.  She, of course, sweetly explained to my husband that she didn't want to cause any problems between us.  He assured her that she wouldn't, all the while I was staring at him with a look that could probably be fatal.  I don't know what's worse, having to put up with him, or her.  I love him, and we get along together very well when he's not making life changing decisions without consulting me. We have been married for five years, and have no children because of fertility issues.  So every chance she gets she brings up that she can't wait for her only baby to have a baby.  Even though she knows that this is a VERY sore subject.  I can't think of anything else.  I'm just so angry with him, and I can't stand her.  
kenoqueen83 kenoqueen83
22-25, F
1 Response Jun 8, 2007

What frightens me is your husband's apparent lack of concern about your feelings... I second eve7's advice!