Borderline Mil, How I Feel Today!

I have been in pain and struggling with the MIL for so long I almost forgot that neither one is normal, and especially now that I have a son I have to cut off the dead tissue, as they say (eew?). That is why I just cannot do it with this BEOTCH anymore, and if her husband wants to stand by her and to dismiss my wonderful husbands' emotions, well he can bag it too. I WISH I could play these messages for you, you would die. She sounds like a crazy woman from a Lifetime Movie or like a complete psychotic, going from one rant to another, each one more assanine (sp?) than the next. I seriously doubt that after the last message I will EVER have a relationship with her again, and you can bet your behind she will NEVER see my son again unsupervised, if at all. I need to start being grateful for the small improvements. Social Security just denied me because even though I am not allowed to sit or stand for more than 15 minutes, and after walking or swimming I need to lie down for 1-2 hours, they say that I can do some type of work. If you hear of any jobs where you can get paid good money to lie down all day, please email me lol. I had 2 of THE BEST grandmothers, and I surely wanted the same for my son. I NEVER intended to have things like this, and it took a lot for me to make this decision, but I truly feel it is what is best for him, and since my husband is a Music Producer and has a studio in the basement, I am going to have him copy the messages and someday, when my son is older, if he asks why they are not in his life I will talk to him honestly (without trashing her) and then play the message for him. Then we can discuss why Mommy and Daddy made the choice they did. That is a LONG way off, currently I told him that she is sick and I feel that anything deeper may hurt or confuse him even more. I wish so much that things could be different, but time spent wishing is time wasted, so they say, so I am DOING the best that I can. I have been making a genuine effort to be kinder to my DH and more loving and patient, although it is difficult to be patient when he gets home at 730 or 8pm (he works until 2am Thursdays, Radio Show Producing) and I have been fighting the pain all day, but I am really trying. My son is a gift from God, and so is my husband. I hope that I am strong and smart enough to never forget those things, and to treat them accordingly, no matter how difficult it may seem. Plus, I am FIERCELY independent, which presents a problem... I hope things get better for all of us.... Take Care and Best of Luck!
nilestheninja nilestheninja
31-35, F
1 Response Jun 14, 2007

You sound like you have a very difficult situation to contend with, but you also seem to want to make the best of it, and are actively recognizing what you can do to make it better. That takes a lot of strength. Good luck to you!