Mother In Law Sucks

Hi There,

I don't know if some have same experience in her life. I am married for almost 2.5 years. I am from India and my father passed away when I was young. I had a very bad past and some how managed to complete my studies.

When I was married my mother clearly asked my MIL if they want dowry . They said NO. After marrige she keeps on commeting about money. Makes very bad comments about my family . Now each brother and sister in my family are earning well but still she keeps bad mouthing us. I avoid telling her anything but I feel hurted myside.

My husband is another strange story. He is a big miser. He just loves money.I am working person. I pay for rent of apartment groceries etc.  He never spend anything on me. He says we should learn to live a simple life.
While back in India , his mom keeps on calling today I want money for this thing /that thing and he just send money to him no matter how much big sum it is. I told him once whever I ask you spending a single penny on myself you give a big lecture on money saving  and your mom spend money like queen  his reply was she is my mom and she can spend whever she want.

I don't know what to do. I just feel myself alone. I work whole day and whole evening is spent on cooking for this guy.

I don't know what to do.:(
pc pc
22-25, F
5 Responses Jul 13, 2007

be a Lioness .. warn your husband once and well in advance.. tht if he keep behaving like this (miser) and coward (coz he cant say anything to his mom)... u r too well a strong and a self made girl (unlike other girls coz u have lost ur father).. u r educated to sue him .. tell him if today his mom will not behave properly today with u ... whn she ll grow old u ll also give her *** for tat and will not ask her for a glass of water... better tht ur hubby and ur mil starts to behave in a right manner with u .. else u cant just warn then tht u ll divorce him and take away half of his property..... but remember these r just warnings.. dnt be serious to make it true... some people understand this language only.... u can also tell him tht u r undergoing depression and u will suicide and will leave a note with will say ur hubby and mil r responsible for my death.. then he will keep spending on court cases... just warn him never try to commit.. coz ur r precious and so is ur life..

Same story here! I would have refused this marriage if I knew that they were greedy type but they refused to take dowry. But they wanted that dowry in name of gifts which they thought my parents should have done without asking. My parents did their best by giving lots of gifts even in gold to their huge huge families(my FIL's and MIL's) but my MIL is never satisfied and she brainwashed my husband about the quality of gifts my parents had given which is far better than what they wear or get!!<br />
Besides my income and bank balance which they already think is theirs they want my retired parents to give them expensive gifts to help them releive their debts.

Do you live in the uk, he should be contributing anyway, get your own bank account, not shared and put a small amount into the shared account each month, tell him that he can spend it as he wishes, stop buying food for him, feed only yourself, he may get a job then.

It couldn't be me! <br />
I don't mind helping out but I come first! He couldn't telling me nothing about spending money on myself. If he want to cut back on spending money, he would be cuting back on his mother! He sure wouldn't get no more of my money thats for sure. By having a hard childhood means I must make my life the best it could be.

There is a saying where I come from.<br />
Things will never change while she is in the picture.<br />
You need to ask yourself if you are willing to put up with this abuse and negativity towards you . <br />
You are not his slave you BOTH EAT the food YOU PAY FOR you both live in the same house YOU PAY RENT FOR and he sends all of his monie to his mother the old miser . What will happen when you have children and you wont be able to go out and work to support him and his mother would assume when the old dear your mil gets to old to look after herself where do you think she will go TO HER PRECIOUS SON OF COURSE and who do you think will be looking after her. (Not Him)<br />
I think they dont deserve you <br />
You deserve someone who will treat you the way you deserve to be treated person not a monie making machine <br />
Its never to late to make changes . before they lower you self estem mor than what it is