Here is another little list, compiled from past cottage visits. I don't know why MIL thinks these are fun for us.
Before you read on, I am posting a series of stories and trying to paint an accurate picture of my MIL, these do capture what a visit with her is like, just some little personality characteristics of MIL.
1. MIL walks around in her bra and underwear when we are at the cottage.
2. MIL does not shut the door when she uses the washroom.
3. MIL sleeps like a bat, with her legs up the wall- for circulation.
4. MIL sucks on garlic and stinks
5. MIL brings a bucket to the beach for my DD to pee in even though DD can use a toilet just fine.
6. MIL slurps herbal concautions up and down and through her nose.
7 MIL eats and talks with her mouth full while she is eating, usually about how much flavour is in the food.
8 MIL pretends to be hard of hearing. But once the phone rang and you could barely hear it but she could, she was the only one too.
9 MIL fakes ineptitude- pretends all of a sudden she can no longer work her dishwasher, can no longer figure out how to push the button on the answering machine.
10 MIL fakes diseases too. She was once doing a pretty hilarious job faking mental deterioration, alheimers type. She failed to do her research though on what it actually looked like. She ended up looking like someone doing a very poor job trying to fake something. It was pretty funny actually. She didn't fake that one for too long. Think she realized it was not working.
11 MIL strips down on the beach, naked to change into dry clothing. It is so gross.
12. MIL bakes muffins in say June. What does not get eaten she freezes. The kicker here is though that these muffins get taken in and out of the freezer all year. I am so sure we will even be seeing these muffins next summer. She is just too busy to cook you know.
13. For dessert, MIL will put frozen cherries in a bowl and serve it to you. They are so frozen that you can not possible chew them then she bugs you and bugs you to eat them and then plays victim as you just don't like her cherries.
14. Has a collection of plastic bags, these bags are everywhere in every drawer. If she took them all out she could fill an entire room.
15. MIL boils vegetables and then saves the juice from the pan and drinks it as that is where all the vitamins are. She does not want to use a steamer so that the vitamins stay in the vegetables. She wants all the vitamins for herself.
16. Once when I was cooking for her and FIL, I was told by MIL that I'd better watch out...FIL like her simple cooking. Then MIL kept trying to intrude on my recipe by adding ingredients that don't belong.
17 Competitions with other kids DD's age. Constantly doing this. Compares her to lady's granddaughter at beach and to her other grandchildren. Blame my DD for the behavior of other grandchild.
18. Always makes sure that she replaces DD's photo's with other granddaughters. Usually puts other photo over DD in the very fr
19. When I made dinner, she could not admit that I made it from scratch. She kept insisting I bought it from M&M meats already pre-made. She claimed this, even though she watched me make it from scratch.
20. Told BIL and SIL not to worry, my DD was just as fat as their child. This is funny as my DD was always around the 10th percentile weight wise, so this was not even true.
21 Keeps trying to guess at DH's ex girlfriend names and then trains my DD to say their names and claim they are around. The one girl she was claiming to be around was actually 5 hours away at the time. MIL again did not do her homework. I only asked as I was laughing at what MIL was doing, it was pretty funny.
22 Always trying to give DH her grocery list
23. Likes to pack up all her garbage and put it in the back of our mini van to take back home with us for a 2 hour trip. They charge per garbage bag where the cottage is. The kicker here is that her husband was coming back as well a day later and he had an empty mini van without 2 kids in it. DD was crying due to all the flys the garbage was attracting and I had a new baby in the van too. I told DH never to agree to that again. He agreed without asking me about this when it happened.