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I Hate My Mother

I Wish She Wasn't My Mother

By: joanne1600
Written on February 15th, 2008
my mother has been such an impact on my life. When i was only 16 she begged me to have sex with a guy right in front of her so she claims we can eat. but i know that she wanted to just get high. At the time i was hungry and alone so i did it. I never forgot that day. Since then I have forgiven her and have her in my life. She given me up to foster homes and both times the men have molested me and she knew and never did anything about it. I am now 35 with my own kids and still in pain. She lives downstairs from me and only calls me when she needs something. I am always there for her. She is never there for me. I wish she would just realize what she has put me threw and try to be a better mother. She is sooo mean and full of hate. I've tried to let her go. When she is not in my life I am happy. When she is in my life I am so miserable. How can I just let her go. I don't want to love her anymore. I am an alcoholic from all this an addict. I am in treatment and doing so well, She is my main trigger and I know that! But Then why do I feel bad If i stay away???
By: joanne1600
Age: 31-35
1,456 people have read this story

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2 responses
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    nehaamin
    nehaamin

    my mother is just like ur mother she is rude and mean too.......im only 13 and i feel that i'll die soon all cuz of my mother,she donot let me talk with my friends and whenever she sees that i am texting she abuse me i dont know y she thinks that i am talking with a guy.....i really dont know what to do i am stucked and wish that i'll die soon because my life with my mother is verry difficult

    Apr 1, 2011
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    yvonne35
    yvonne35

    Ending your relationship with your mother (the trigger) is vital to your sobriety.I am sorry you had to endure so much pain through out your life.The health of you and your children is what's most important now.A woman who could use her child (to get a fix) does not care about you and I don't think it would bother her at all if you started useing again. I hope you have been able to moniter her interaction with your children.If she could use you in this way.This woman may try to use your kids as well.Get away from her as fast as you can...I'll be praying for you..

    Feb 27, 2010
    2 likes