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Always Neglected

Ever since I can remember, I've dealt with my parents being addicts. I constantly had to deal with seizures when they would decide it was finally time for them to get 'clean,' to them passing out in their own puke. I grew up having to care for myself and my brother and they pretty much would live in their own little f***** up world, and would just buy us food whenever they remembered to. But about 4 years ago my mom finally got her act together and became sober. She had been sober for almost 3.5 years before she started doing it again. My dad on the other hand, has been smoking crack on and off for my whole life. I just wish they would stop and realize how much of an impact their lives have had on me. I am constantly living in fear that they will pass out and die and my brother and I will be left alone, although other days I think that would be the best scenario. They obviously sell drugs too so we have quite a bit of money. This lets them think that it's okay to keep doing it because they are providing us with stuff that other kids don't necessarily have. I would rather have nothing and just have a happy family rather than materialistic things whose purpose is to distract me from the problem I have to deal with everyday. It's because of this that I truly hate my parents. They've chosen their addictions over my brother and I for ever and it will always stay like that. The only thing I can thank them for is showing me everything a parent should not be.
26vampirediaries 26vampirediaries 18-21 1 Response Sep 10, 2012

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That is very hard. You have the right attitude though. You can improve on the model and raise your children in a better way. Then, you will have the happy family that you long for.