I mostly have homework that I have to use computer or like to listen to music while doing homework and my dad thinks I play games while I do it. Sure I did once long ago, I mean years ago and my dad and MUM is still thinking I am and I'm not trusted. Every time my parents says I have to get rid of devices from my "bed"room and thinks its a "work"and"bed" only room. Lately I always try to get my trust back that never happened. For FOUR YEARS! And right now and then I feel lonely and a worthless child, never being trusted, always thinking to commit suicide and I live in a 10th floor in a apartment. I told my parents that I will commit suicide if you don't believe me and believe it or not they opened the window for me... That happened to me before too and it wasn't my first time either. Later that night I wasn't able to sleep since it was my second time that happened and first I was really shocked the first but then the second time I really lost self-confidence. After that my mum came in my room to talk about it and she said she doesn't want me to suicide, I wish I can believe that but I can't especially when my mum was on dad's side when it happened and I tend to rip up all the love notes I made to my parents when I was little. Also my dad didn't even apologise! I can still see the darkness in his souls and I'm fed up. Lately I feel like to suicide when my parents are asleep. I wish I can deal with this for the next few years so I get old enough to move from my parents house ASAP if this continues... If only it's possible...
LonelyHatedChild LonelyHatedChild
16-17, M
1 Response Aug 21, 2014