Almost 18 Years In Hell.

My "mom" is a *****. Ever since I was little, she would sleep all day and not really pay attention to me or my "sister"(who is also worlds biggest ****). We would always be late to school because she was sleeping. This would still be happening today except I have other people to give me rides in the morning. She just wont wake up. Or she will say she's awake, and you leave her room and she goes right back to sleep. The stress of being late to school everyday was really tearing me down because I would get in trouble for it. Even back in middle school, I would have to walk all the way to school because after trying for a half hour to get her up, I would just leave and ge to school late, and then have to walk home and pound on the door because I had no key and she was STILL sleeping. When she got pregnant with my little brother, she would still smoke. Even when she was having complications and had to be hospitalized, she would go outside for "smoke breaks". My brother was born at 7 months and I think about 3 pounds. He had to be kept in an incubator because of this vile *****. After he was able to be taken home, she would go outside the house to smoke(to protect him from the smoke..dumb *****) probably for the first year, and then continued to smoke in the house around us. And she takes whatever chance she can to make you feel like ****. She'll mumble things under her breath if she knows you are there to hear it. She slams things around if you are there to hear that too. She constantly tries to make everyone else feel like ****, and then makes herself the victim. She KNOWS that second hand smoke is incredibly damaging, but continues to do it around her family. She smokes about 2 packs a day. She will say **** to my brother like "stop acting like your sister." Or if he's acting up, even if there's guests in the house she'll spout some **** like, "Im not allowing any more than one of my kids to act like this" referring to me. And when my brother was, idk maybe 6 or 7, she said something like this to him "im going to slam my head into a wall and drip the blood on you and leave and never come back". TO A ******* 6-7 YEAR OLD CHILD. She constantly plays that bullshit "i want to leave and never come back".. I wish she would leave.


 


Both of my parents made fun of me when they found out I cut. And would talk **** about me. They call me a ****, even though my "mom" had 2 kids before she was 18. And I'm pretty sure not by the same guy. Although I haven't had a DNA test to prove it yet. I am a disgrace to white people, because I fancy dating guys of different races.


 


I'm afraid to live in this house because my dad and his hick friend talk about how white women who sleep with black men should be shot.. if they found out about Vennie..?


 


Anger is my "dads" answer to everything. He is always yelling at my little brother. Even when our "sister" (who is 19 btw) is picking on the little guy, he gets in trouble. She is the cause of every problem. She is always saying some **** about me, and I ignore it. The one time I say something back, she physically attacks me, and I GET IN TROUBLE.


 


 

Honestly I could go on and on, but Im tired and upset and full of anger and want to scream now so im just gonna leave it at that for now.

BiancaFaye BiancaFaye
18-21, F
4 Responses Feb 17, 2010

well.........!!!! i<br />
understand your<br />
problem....your parents<br />
is not good of doing all<br />
these..it is too much<br />
bad...& i wonder that<br />
how you are affording<br />
all this......leave your<br />
parents if they dont<br />
loves you.....you can<br />
create your own<br />
life...where there is no<br />
one who commands on<br />
you. only<br />
thinking....could not<br />
give you<br />
anything..go....step<br />
ahead.....and make your<br />
own life......ok let me<br />
tell you something about<br />
my life...i'm girl of<br />
15........i want to leave<br />
my home cuzz....I dont<br />
want to stay there any<br />
more.I have soo many<br />
problems in my life. The<br />
Big problem iz related to<br />
my parents..... i dont<br />
like them...cuzz they<br />
dont alow me to go out<br />
with<br />
friends..even.....the<br />
nearest place to our<br />
house......... nor even<br />
alone.....my whole day<br />
is passed in my<br />
room.....i dont have<br />
freedom at<br />
all ....whenever me and<br />
my friends make<br />
plan .....of going<br />
somewhere.......i never<br />
get permitted by my<br />
parents.......they dont<br />
like that...i go out with<br />
friends.......they want<br />
me to stay at<br />
home.........can any<br />
one ...pass their whole<br />
life in home.Just i go 2<br />
collage .at morning ,then<br />
nowhere.Even on<br />
weekend i cant go<br />
out ...so..in view of all<br />
these ..how can i satisfie<br />
with my life....i am<br />
facing all this for many<br />
years . but i think that<br />
now is the time to take<br />
some action.........i hv<br />
planned that i'll leave<br />
my house...& I'll create<br />
my own life....where<br />
there is no one...who<br />
commands on me....& i<br />
think it is possible...it is<br />
surely possible......but<br />
some times i<br />
think....that it will be<br />
more better ...if i have a<br />
girl partner with<br />
me .....so tell me....do<br />
you want to go with<br />
me........we can start<br />
afresh.....& i'm saying<br />
you...cuzz after leaving<br />
my home....i'll leave my<br />
country as well....& i'll<br />
shift in a safest<br />
country...of the<br />
world......but..... there i<br />
dont know<br />
anyone.......& also m<br />
going alone...so...dont<br />
you think.....that a girl<br />
feel safe when someone<br />
is with her.....& in other<br />
words........if a girl want<br />
safety she needs a<br />
company.....so now the<br />
decission is up to<br />
you....tell me if<br />
yes........

if i can be of any help...

hey look, theres one option, just get the hell out and dont look back. x

Oh my God. That is really ****** up. I'm in a similar problem and I'm finally moving the **** out of here in 5 months. I don't know if this works for you or not but all I do is just ignore them and whenever they start talking crap, I go into my room, and play really loud music using headphones. They think that I'm still listening to their garbage when I'm really not. Anyway if you haven't already, try to leave at all costs.