Unimportant

Well i dont know what it is with me i keep hitting rock bottom. I was in some abusive relationships verbally, physically, emotionally, sexually. I dont know but i keep going from one bad relationship to worse to the worst. I find them all. I went on a date someone who raped me felt like i was the lowest form of life, i apologized to him because i kept saying no & he got mad at me, i dont know why i apologized,It seems like i get my self into these situations growing up. I dont even know any more which direction to take im tired of getting cheated on, lied to all the time, being hit sometimes for no reason. I was put down accused of things that werent true it seems like that is what i deserved. I dont know what i did that was so bad . It my fault because i let them do this to me & still stayed to try to make it work. It never did work i get scared sometimes now not knowing how they are going to be. They all started off really nice i never knew that this is the way they were.
kmn4 kmn4
36-40, F
2 Responses May 15, 2012

I truly understand. Rape is not an easy thing to get over by no meens. :) and neither r these relationships of ours.

I totally understand you. I've only been in two serious relationships. Besides my permiskuous (dont know how that's spelt) teens. But the one I've been I. For 4 1/2 yrs. Totally on the rocks. And im not to sure either why I still lasted this long. I'm trying really really hard right now to b strong. But its still hard.

I've been with now for 4 1/2 yrs.***

Thank u for ur comment meekme . I am sorry for all that u been through. I know its hard but stay strong u are stronger than u think.

Thank you so much! And likewise. Us strong girls need to stick together. We are much more stronger than we think. ;)