So Torn, Maybe You Can HelpI am a newlywed, happy as can be. I love my husband and am blessed to have him in my life but what comes with new husbands comes undesirable relatives. In this case my husband's sister.
I made my husband's sister a bridesmaid ( first mistake). We were engaged for approx. 2 years. I made the girls get their dresses a little early, she was not pleasant. She didn't speak ( to anyone) stated what she could and could not wear and at the end she said expressed her distress on not having a ring yet for herself . After that I heard nothing from her until a month before the wedding. She asked me nothing and when I did bring it up she would walk away or choose not to be involved.
Once things got going with the parties and thangs... she complained I didn't like her and called her brother to express her sadness about losing her brother with tears and complaints. She blamed my sister for not including her ( happen to be my maid of honor) and continued to complain about the one job she was given as a bridesmaid ( she blamed a lot of things on my sister). When the bachlorette party came around she informed my sister that she could not pay more than everyone else ( since she was a bridesmaid it was arranged they would pay the extra expenses). She said this wasn't explained to her and that she wasn't paying, she proceeded to tell my sister she was planning everything wrong and when she has been a bridesmaid before this was never the way things were arranged. She refused to pay until I called her and basically told her to put up or shut up and she had the option not to come ( but she would still have to pay due to her being a bridesmaid), she came.
Day of the party she took one photo of me , then proceeded to constantly text in the limo, not speak to anyone. When my friend proposed a toast she did not join until I "made her". She did not speak to me to rest of the night.
There have been many things that have bothered me about this girl. I was even blamed for putting her into my wedding ( by her mother and herself). I was chastised for putting her in my wedding just because she was his sister and letting her know that fact when she asked me.
I can't seem to write it all down, all the things that erk me about this little girl ( I use " little girl" not because of her age but for her mentality) but her attitude and behavior through the process of my wedding has made me LOATH her. I feel horrible because I usually don't let people get to me . I have decided to separate myself completely from her ( and partially her mother) just for my mental safety ( and their physical lol) for as long as I can.
My dilemma is that she is getting married sometime early next year and my husband has been appointed a groomsman ( double standard I suppose, she did the same thing I did ). I don't want to go to the wedding. I'm not a fake person and I want to support my husband but I don't feel like I would be welcome or genuinely happy for her ( I'm not!). I just don't care for her and my husband will be busy most of the time so "supporting" him would be from a distance.
What should I do????
Thank you for reading
caramelcakes 31-35, F 7 Responses 0 Jul 9, 2012