My Step-father Is An Ignorant Piece-o-crap

For years this man has been the bane of my existence. He and my mom have been together for seven years and I have not grown to love, like or tolerate him. In the beginning he was a little turd that drank a lot and came home drunk often. He would insult me about my weight, he came into my room once when I was 13 and came into my bed late at night because he was drunk and didn't want to let her know. He hit me when I was younger but wasn't stupid enough to try it again. When I was younger and even now he used to bad-mouth my biological father and say how he (stepdad) was more a father than my real father.

My mom didn't make me get used to him either. She said I have to call him dad (or some form of it) or call him uncle. I HATED that I still don't call him anything consistent because it's awkward and I don't want anyone thinking that we have a close relationship. I don't know why I can't call him by his first name like everyone I know calls their stepfather.  He's my distant cousin on top of it.

Now I'm 18 and he just shout at me again because he has problems and he needs to deal with them. He screamed at my mother (And I am so serious that he never lowers his voice, so you would always hear my mother's rational voice and his yelling) that I'm lazy and he doesn't want me around his children (who are 6 and 2) and that she should step up and tell me something about it. Then he saw me walking past and started shouting at me about how he knew I heard him and how things around here are going to change because he's the man of the house (excuse me - apartment) and it's his way or the highway and said that I'm a grown woman and that I could just leave if I didn't like it. Then I asked him to lower his voice and he got freakin' louder.

But the thing that makes me want to lash out even more is that my mother just sits there like the good little Christian woman that she is and takes it. She won't stick up to me or herself and when he starts to cuss she just laughs and takes it. He insults her and she just grins and bears it.

I want to leave so badly but I can't because I have no family that can take me in or I want to be taken into. My biological father could care less because he has 7 illegitimate children and he just got married into a 'real' family in February to a woman who brought in 2 kids of her own. I'm working this summer but nothing that will support me at all.

I know that I'm 18 and I should be leaving the nest but I haven't even finished college as yet, which I'm putting myself through. I really would like advice as well as to how I could leave. I would even love to leave the country. I don't want to stay here any longer.

I hate this house. I hate this marriage. I hate this man. And I hate MY LIFE.
1Myfanwy1 1Myfanwy1
6 Responses Jul 18, 2010

Holy ****...I had no idea that so many other people out there were going through pretty much the almost EXACT situation as me. It is nice to know that we are not alone, but at the same time it is disappointing to know that there are so many horrible people out there .-.

Dude I'm just the same way,difference? I'm 11 do I can't leave even though I wish to move with my friends who have a better life. My stepdad got offended YESTURDAY because I said only stepdad I hate him too and my mom is a christian and sits there.Watching so your not the only one:) hope you move soon :) FL MIA ...brianna

No matter how hard it gets keep fighting for what you know you need, want and deserve. And please for God's sake please don't have any kids at your young age. I got preggers at your age and that was a foolish decision that has made it even harder to get out of life's rut. I also married the father which makes it even worse. Now Im trying to raise a kid, get out of my marriage and be financially independent. I have no college degree and no money. You must save lots of money until you can get out. And talk to other people when you need to. BELIEVE that God or the universe or whomever you'd like to call it- its all the same thing- really CAN guide your way and give you answers and strength. You actually are God. You have the power you just have to learn how to use it.

Sounds like a ******* loser. You on the other hand should be commended for how strong, smart and brave you are. I know you won't ever be like this loser-*** dickhead broken man. You aren't alone hon.....

My cousins all joined the military to get away from their biological father who was an jerk like this. They all got training, housing and money for their education when they got out. Yes, they all saw some combat (somalia, Desert Storm) but it lifted them out of a terrible home situation and made men out of them, who now are good fathers and husbands to their own wives. It broke the cycle of poverty that their mom had got them mired in and let them see that there was a way out of that horrible mess. <br />
<br />
If that isn't for you, work hard to get the best grades you can in school, work part time and put what money you can in a bank account ( don't spend it on stupid crap like fancy shoes, gold chains, rims, etc) and go to community college and get a job and get the heck out of there. You can do it! Do not get anyone pregnant, or you will just be continuing the process for your children.

wow i feel u bro. im a poor *** niqqa. my dads a dumb ******* tenant at the house were currently living at. i have no room. my dad acts like he can throw me around like what he did to my mom couple of years ago. like earlier this morning he comes into my room thinking he can make me do ****. he kicks my laptop a couple of times. i got mad at him and we got into this long *** fight. i try to hold back but he ******* ****** the **** out of me. im pooor soo that means i cant get my own place. i almost in the same position as you. no one can take me in and if they could i wouldnt be able to finish h.s. but dude you'll pull through it. in a year imma be going to the philiphines after h.s and before i go on the plane imma beat the **** out of my dad for not being a father and beating my mother.<br />
just remember man people can always relate to another and everone almost has the same life experiences. as long as he doesnt abuse you your ******* goood to go man.