Powerless

Somehow it makes me feel better about my situation to post on this site. I like this group. It's almost like my journal. :)

Well, anyway, SD is at the house. DH's visitation is kind of weird, and there are no set days, but I kind of figured she'd be with us tonight. Even though she was with us all last weekend. I actually knew she'd be here by the way DH never said a single word about her coming. He tends to do that. So, he calls me at work today and I happen to hear her odious voice in the background. (Nails on a chalkboard, seriously). Well. All I had to say was GREAT, and he heard me say it, but didn't press me about it.

I'm angry about this whole situation. I hate it. Her drama, her mother's drama, her infantile behavior, all just make me grit my teeth. I hate seeing her, hearing her. I want him to give up custody of her. I don't want her around anymore. Let her crazy mother have her... She'll grow up to be like her one day anyway.

I want to rage at him sometimes and say all the nasty things that go through my mind, but I know it wouldn't do any good. I feel like I need to voice it though, like if I did, I would feel better. Sometimes I find myself really wanting to pick a fight with him about it just so I can say those things. But to what end? It wouldn't do any good.

I just feel powerless.
Milktheostrich Milktheostrich
26-30, F
3 Responses Sep 16, 2012

I told my husband today his 3 daughters are ruining our marriage... I feel the same way as you.... I can't stand seeing them, I hate them in my house, I hate their mother and I resent him for it all... Ugh. Why did I do this...

I`ve been following your posts and I know this is going to sound like the standard question, but have you ever thought about a few sessions of therapy for your husband and yourself? The only reason I ask is because I have this terrible feeling that your marriage is being affected so badly by all of this. Having been through this myself, I now understand that all the years that my husband and I were together, all of the little problems, moments of resentment, anger, disgust, etc...they were all laying the groundwork for a terrible outcome...namely separation. I do believe you when you say your SD will end up being like her mother. I know my SD did...not that it came as a shock because from the time she was 5 or 6, I saw personality traits in her that were so similar to her mother. Fastforward almost 11 years and she is a 16 year old waste of space like her mother. None of this is healthy for you and it will enventually catch up to you. You will look back 10 years from now and say...what the hell was I thinking?

Well. One thing at a time, I guess. He's still coming to terms with his own feelings on the situation. We're caught up with other things at the moment... Our son is due in January and we're all crazy about baby!

me too. i just don't understand why it has to be soo hard.