Step Daughter

Hey guys... I'm accually the step daughter here and I just wanted y'all to know my story... I was in tears tonight simply because of my step mom. That's when I stumbled across this website. I just wanted some perspective on how you,step moms,view us. It seems you guys think that their last marriage was a mistake same as the children conceived. Granted; the way you all describe these girls would make anybody want to hate them.

My step mom cheated on my dad. Plain as day. Their marriage has never been the same again. I didn't care,honestly. It just wasn't my place. Every time they got into a fight about it she would run into my room screaming "are you happy now?? You destroyed my marriage!" I never retaliate because there's just no winning with her... I didn't cheat on my dad and never once did I say she had... December 2nd 2011 they were in another fight again. This time she kicked me out of the house. Her reason? "Bc you have a stupid *** look on your face! Get the **** out of my house and don't bother coming back!" May I remind you,this was in December and we live in Iowa. Yes,their was snow on the ground. I thought "ok,it's your house. Fine." So I left. I spent a few nights with different friends and just chilled at the skatepark waiting for her to cool down. My dad came and got me and took me back. I didn't argue. I barely said two words on the ride home. Got there and went straight to my room. She always says nasty things about both of my parents. I just wanted to know what I did to make her hate me so much... I accually thought we were gonna be cool with each other from the way my dad talked about her:/ but since I moved in all he has to say is nasty things... I don't want to be apart of this and I don't even know how I became a target from that topic. That's how I found this blog/group thingie... I'm 14 years old. I was on my period today and put on pajama pants after school bc I bled through my jeans. She got in my face about how "I'm nothing special and I never will be,to get used to it,and every woman goes through it&again,am nothing special" so I'm just sitting there like "thanks... You have now changed my whole outlook on life"

I barely talk to her because she gives off that vibe... That vibe where it's like "stay away or ill cut out your throat" ..... I do what she asks me to do,I clean up the play room and I do the dishes...it's not even worth saying "ok" to anything that's being requested without it being classified as "disrespectful back-talk" so I just do these things and go back to my room.

My brother died in 2010. He was my only biological brother. She yells at me because I don't like to accept her two sons as my brothers and she says "it's bad for her reputation" if I only claim them as my step brothers... I tried explaining to her why I do that and she started slamming doors in my face... To make things worse she had another son with my father and got mad at me bc I don't like to be near him.

I'm sorry,i love my real brother and nobody will ever be as amazing as he was<3

Tonight,she was telling me how my mom must be dead and my father agreed with her. They've been saying this for two months and I haven't heard from her since.

I just want you guys to see what we go through to:/ I would never lay a finger on her or her children or her marriage... What did I do? I've took the blame for multiple things,big and small and apologized. Things she or her sons did.. I've stood up for her kids at school (we'r all in 8th grade) and her oldest has Autism. I still stand up for him.

I'm sorry for getting all up in your group. I mean no disrespect.
An Ep User An EP User
5 Responses Jan 23, 2013

Its things like you dont want to be around your brother that can tell ppl how you are. If your father has another baby that baby IS YOUR REAL BROTHER/SISTER.

I'm a stepmom and went to hell and back with my stepdaughter, but you know what, we finally found each other along the way, sorted our differences, learned to love and respect each other. She's your age now. I have a little baby boy and she loves her baby brother more than anything. Give your little half brother a chance (I know he's not your brother who passed-away, but he also needs your love and is still a baby who's not gonna understand why his big sis doesn't love him).

A mom is suppose to be the glue in the family, and it's not always easy. You know, we still have our fights, but it's normal, but I'm not breaking her down. Always trying to build her up.

Good luck with your Stepmom. Try to give her a little love and see what happens, maybe that's all she needs or try and have a heart-to-heart talk with her, when you see she's not in some sort of mood.

That's what I did with my SD and it finally worked for us.

Good luck you precious child and loads of hugs.

How she is acting towards you has nothing to do with you. It has to with herself. She obviously has emotional issues and can't handle the situation. Just remember your dad may not have energy or not want to deal with the conflict. You just keep you dignity and never let this lady or anyone define how you see yourself. Sometimes you may have to be more mature han certain adults.

My heart breaks for you as I read this. I'm not a step mom, like you I had a very unloving step mother who made my life painful and lonely. Please don't let her break you. Dont let her make you feeI worthless because you are the child and she's the adult who should be doing better. I know it hurts to be living day to day in home that makes you feel unloved, but it won't be that way forever. <3

<3