I Hate My Stepson And My Feelings For My Husband Are Almost Gone
Married when step son was 9. Step hated me from the moment I appeared. Dad can't discipline child, due to guilt??? Step went to stay with mom from 13-15. Came back bigger and more pissed. Stayed about a year and moved in with grandma so she could commiserate with him on how evil I was. Hm, never yelled at him, hit him or mistreated him in any way. Step married and years went by. Drugs and drinking, wife threw him out. Rehab. Back to wife, then back to drugs and drinking. Wife thru him out THEN he lost his job. 34 yrs. old and moved in with grandma. Now he constantly calls and leaves rude comments on machine. Always asking for money but doesn't pay back. Will sit in our drive and call our phone until daddy runs out to talk to him. Drama, spewing nastiness, whining ball of uselessness! We haven't had a moments peace since Nov. 2008. He loves to cause problems between me and his dad. We've been in therapy since last June, not helping much. My hubby's emotions are so tied to him I feel like the other woman. He lets him jerk him around and treat me rudely. We had company on Sunday and he started calling. Hubby asked me not to answer. Finally couldn't take the ringing anymore and politely told him we were eating and had company and dad would call him back later. Silence I said his name and he hung up on me (not the first time). Then proceeds to call and call until daddy answered and told the Prince he'd call him later. Then dad stays mad at me all day because I answered the phone. I think I should be able to answer my own damn phone! It's like being held hostage by a 4 year old. I wish my hubby would get a spine and kick the Prince in the butt. I've spent years trying to be the understanding spouse and stepmom. I have run out of patience and kindness Never once have I felt mean, been mean or vindictive towards the step. Now though, I absolutely hate the step with a rage that scares me. I'm worried I'm going to lose it and lower myself to his sorry level. I think this is the end of my marriage. Thanks to everyone for their stories, I now realize I'm not alone and you can't have functional if you are dealing with severe dysfunction. Even though my hubby says if I'll just stay out of the way and keep my mouth shut and let them do the "sick dance" everything will be fine, I can now shout, "It's not my fault!" and "I don't have to participate!"